So I guess from the title it's pretty obvious, I've now been in my flat in halls for just over a month now, I live with 2 oter girls & 3 guys (2 of which will move out in december so 2 new ones will come in). Here's my dilema......I have fallen really hard for the guy who will live here until we move out in June, he is absolutely beautiful! We get on very well as we have very similar music taste, like the same things & can have a laugh over anything, and his english accent is to die for. Now I'm not sure if he fancies me, whenever I go into the kitchen he'll check to see who it is & will always come in & sit with me for a few hours ether chatting away or watching something together, he has asked me advice on a girl he slept with in the first week who won't leave him alone now & how he regrets it. Also when I split with my bf, he was there, giving me hugs & helping me get through it with talks from experiecne (he broke up with his gf a few months ago).
My question is, is it a good idea 'messing about' with a flatmate, now it could go well or it could end badly and we'd have to live with each other until moving out. Has anyone else ever been in this situation? What did you do? I'm scared if I get drunk, I'll end up blurting it out, whenever I see him in a towel, I blush like crazy so I think he may have caught on, I cannot control myself!
You miss 100% of the shots you never take. If you pursue something just make sure you discuss it first and determine if you can dnale any "fall out" without drama to the other flatmates. Stranger things have happened than people finding a great relationship with a roomie.
I think you could either take this one or two ways. Firstly, you could just go for it and enjoy it while it lasts as you know he is moving out, see where it goes. However I've been in a very similar position when I worked on a cruise ship. Things can get very messy very quickly and you can end up getting very very hurt. You've both recently split up with previous partners, and I think getting with somebody soon after can sometimes alter how you percieve people/situations/relationships in general.
Secondly, you could always suggest having a couple of drinks and dropping a few hints to see? I think sometimes men are abit stupid and you have to be really obvious and just say it how it is. Or maybe that is my experience with men, lol.
If you do decide to go with it, just be mindful of the fact that at the moment he does have plans to move out. Or this could be the start of something wonderful, who knows! Go with the flow, don't over think it!
You miss 100% of the shots you never take. If you pursue something just make sure you discuss it first and determine if you can dnale any "fall out" without drama to the other flatmates. Stranger things have happened than people finding a great relationship with a roomie.
I think I'd go for it, it'll be over with in June if all goes pear shaped but on the other hand if it doesn't you could have lots of fun until then.
Don't get me wrong though, I'd definitely sound it out first and subtly make suggestions and observe him before making a move. Any chance you can ask him out for drinks alone or something smaller first?
I would try and make sure he fancies you enough first. Otherwise if he rejects you it could make things a little awkward.
I personally would play safe and keep as good friends perhaps a night out at the uni bar and see how things develop but let him make the first move.
+1 and I would add: if he makes the first move, I would take that opportunity to talk with him honestly about the possible negative outcomes... and just take it from there.
Maybe drop some not-so-subtle hints for a date? If you don't try you'll never know! If you're both single and serious about each other it could be amazing, all you have to do is try. A couple of dates, and you'll know :)
Thanks for the advice guys, my flatmate tried to test the water between us by saying something very embarassing & he took it well and we're alright, because he studies podietry, everyone is convinced he has a foot fetish but he assured me he doesn't even though I didn't ask but when I showed interest was teasing me about being curious, awwwww I'm just going to see how things go, we'll be alone in the flat over christmas so maybe then, who knows!
I missed out in life in a big way when I was younger(now nearly 50) so would say go for it on the understanding it may not work out, in years to come you'll say I wish I had just,,,, as I know well.