A bit of a Quandary

Hi all , thinking of purchasing some expensive Lingerie for Mrs L in C but a little reticent , previous partner binned some very expensive items and I swore I would never buy again for someone else . Really not sure what to do ! Any advice

3 Likes

I know it takes away the element of surprise, but could you look at some together. Youā€™d be able to gauge her reaction and also know the sort of things she might like. I love it when my partner buys me things like this. Thereā€™s been a few that Iā€™d not have chosen myself, sometimes itā€™s been a pleasant surprise and Iā€™ve found things I like that Iā€™d never have picked myself! Good luck

2 Likes

Itā€™s a tricky one with underwear. I have always told partners itā€™s a big no no unless I have chosen it myself.

Maybe look through together and see what she likes. Pick several items and suggest you pick something out of those and purchase it for her as a gift?

I donā€™t know your partner or how they will react just giving you my own opinion.

Good Luck

2 Likes

@Lancsincheshire i can give a male perspective on this- My wife said donā€™t buy it, leave it to me.
But I didnā€™t listen to that, I got her sizes from looking at some of her favourites and went and bought some for her.
She actually said my choices are better than hers now.
I mix it up and buy some that are very nice to look at but always practical and then I mix it up with buying soft comfortable ones for her too - everyone wins.

1 Like

I wouldnt recommend it. She may like certain items that hide bits of her body that she doesnā€™t like or steer away from other items. She may prefer certain fasteners (corset / hook and eye etc)
If your going to spend good money on something you want to make sure she likes it and will wear it more than once.
Definately look and choose together

1 Like

Iā€™ve learned this the hard wayā€¦Iā€™ve bought plenty of Lingerie over the years - most of which have been never worn. However I got lucky with a couple that she really liked (and felt happy in) - but as others have said - by far the best way is to get her involved in the decision making. She may or may not be keen - my OH saw me buying Lingerie for her as me saying ā€œI want you to dress up and change how you areā€ (which was I guess partially trueā€¦although I just really love seeing her in Lingerie) and so saw it as a negative. Since then weā€™ve only bought or tested Lingerie that weve looked at together and now its not just sitting in a box - although we recently had a cull and chucked a load away.

Also maybe ask if sheā€™d want to take part on the tester items on here - thereā€™s fair bit of lingerie comes up and weā€™ve certainly come across a few items we wouldnā€™t have normally tried - but through testing have realised that those styles absolutely do suit her and makes her feel sexy.

As seems to be the main theme on the this forum - conversation is key!

Good luck!

3 Likes

For me, if someone buys me some underwear, it is a present more for themselves than for me. I really donā€™t like it.
If you want to buy me something sexy, ask me what I want. That way, Iā€™ll guarantee to wear it and youā€™ll definitely have a good time.

3 Likes

Yup - I think you hit the nail on the head! Thatā€™s exactly how my OH saw it too!

3 Likes

This is exactly the situation I was in. I had bought tons of shit, stuff she would actually wear and then I think I crossed the line with something I bought and she never wore anything again. She has to be in the PERFECT mood to wear something sexy and I agree that she likely does it for me, not her. I swore off buying her anything out of pure spite but I always find myself being sucked back inā€¦

Now I only buy her panties or a bra/panty set that she would wear on a daily basis that is cute or pretty - nothing sexy as I might as well give them to @Blonde_Bunny and @Bex84 to wear and sell.

HEY - maybe that is the new angleā€¦! All of us men who have brand new lingerie that our OHā€™s never touch, wash them, package them up and send them to the girls on here and they wear and sell them. For every 5 they sell they send 1 pair back to us as a giftā€¦lol. Even a simple commission on the sale.

At least they would get used! :rofl: :sleepy:

1 Like

I think itā€™s really as simple as ā€˜listen to what they want/want to doā€™ - happily now that Iā€™m doing that rather than showering her in unwanted lingerie/toys were much happier. We still get plenty of toys/lingerie but knowing itā€™s been a joint decision means they get used and enjoyed - and nothing gets moe off more than seeing my wife truly enjoying herself (as opposed to putting on a fake show for me).

Open, non-pressured communication is the key to a happy relationship (even if there are a few disappointments along the way and fantasies dashed on the rocks - but Iā€™ll take that every day to have the relationship we have today)

2 Likes

Personally sexy underwear is a gift for u both wearer to feel sexy other person to enjoy the confidence & look, I love to receive underwear (especially over flowers) as I know heā€™s wants me & thinks it would look good & yes a good evening would be have to test outfit