You are so right @Kate142 you cannot expect to be compatible all of the time. Masturbation is the answer and i’m glad you your making use of your fingers and toys
I think a more relevant question is - why does it matter? If the main thing you and your partner have is an equal sex drive then I’d argue that’s not particularly a “good” thing or anything to be proud of! I’ll explain. I would say my libido is on the normal/high side, ideally I’d have sex most days. My partner has a lower libido and generally we have sex once a week, sometimes more, but as a rule of thumb once. We’ve talked about it and go for a quality over quantity approach. My two ex partners before her had equal sex drives to me. Here’s the thing though….those relationships didn’t work out. There’s A LOT more to a decent relationship than just libido. Granted sexual desire has to be there but to say things like “my partner isn’t as horny as me” just screams to me - wrong relationship. I’m not saying this to offend anyone but you really do have to consider what you’re looking for if libido is your number 1 priority when looking for a partner (unless maybe it’s a casual FB type of set up)
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100% agree @Shagger11. Sex drive and how horny you or your partner is shouldn’t be the no.1 thing in a long term relationship. If for nothing else because sex-drive rises and falls depending on a whole number of factors. Sometimes they will be the same as your partner, sometimes not.
And like has been said before, if you’re really up for it and they aren’t, that is why LH is your best friend. Toys to make solo play even more fun and enjoyable.
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@AutoScot absolutely. It’s like this - if you were to say to everyone on this forum “would you still be with your partner if they’d only have sex with you once a month?” I think a reasonably high number would say “no”. Not exactly something to be proud of, is it?
Quite a bold claim. Let’s put it to a poll. 
Would you still be with your partner if they’d only have sex with you once a month?
- Absolutely. Sex isn’t everything, you know.
- Well, it wouldn’t be great, but I do enjoy other aspects of our relationship.
- No! Fuck me frequently or lose me forever.
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voters
Extra option added by request after the 5 minute poll edit window:
Would you still be with your partner if they’d only have sex with you once a month?
- Absolutely, as it will be a mind blowing night for both and take a while to recover fully and think of how the next month will be different!
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voters
I think there’s a big element missing from your ‘why does it matter?’ question here - compatibility.
Yes, I understand your point in terms of sex frequency shouldn’t be the primary factor.
It is a compatibility thing, for me at least, which gives quality. It’s quality for me all day long, not quantity.
For example, if my partner was not as open minded as I am, then chances are our relationship may not have lasted. I do have a far higher sex drive, and she has insecurities around certain things, and that is fine. I love her for who she is. I am more open minded and experimental, but Mrs Kink is open minded and experimental enough for me.
Knowing we both enjoy kink nights when we can get them, she loves being submissive leaving me to decide her fate as it were as she knows I love pleasing her more than anything, I like to be more in control and planning, and that works for us.
I may want kink daily, but I know that wouldn’t happen with my OH, and that’s OK. If we did it too often, it would lose the wow factor, and it would become routine.
So we will have more vanilla sex when works for both. My OH said the other day she doesn’t think she’s enough for me sex wise. She’s completely wrong which is exactly what I told her. We have a lovely relationship that is open and honest, and that for me is amazing to have. We can openly talk about anything, and we can be true to ourselves.
She is not into everything I am, but we talk about it all and I understand why some things are for her and other things are not. She makes me a better person.
I was in a relationship around 6/7 years ago with someone, and she had a high libido, but had no interest in anything other than sex and the odd nice outfit for a special occasion. Each time we saw each other we had sex, but it just didn’t do anything for me. We talked about it and we just wanted different things in that sense. We split because we realized we just wanted different things as a whole - the sex side helped highlight other issues between us and we stopped wasting each others time.
Point I’m trying to make in my weird way is frequency for me becomes irrelevant if compatibility is there and both peoples needs are being fulfilled. If compatibility isn’t there sexually, the relationship is unlikely to work as it highlights a bigger incompatibility issue between two people. That’s been my experience anyway. Maybe I come across as very shallow with this, and maybe I am?
I simply find sex is an expression of personality and creativity, taking time and care to learn and understand what really gets my partner going and making her world shake means a lot to me.
@Ian_Chimp Can I be cheeky and ask you to add a 4th answer to your poll so I can answer it?
- Absolutely, as it will be a mind blowing night for both and take a while to recover fully and think of how the next month will be different!
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I’m afraid polls can’t be edited after 5 minutes without resetting them, but I have added in a fudge for you. 
AH thanks mate, what would we do without you?
Added my vote in 
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Lucky for me I am never to horny . I am never horny more than 5 or 6 times a day and always have been . Only one girlfriend has been a match for my sexual activity and that was many years ago . My wife has had near zero sex drive for about 18 YEARS . She is disabled and deals with pain and physical issues along with many medications . So it is me and my imagination and several toys to satisfy my lust . And all you nice people are the only people I can discuss sex with , so thank all of you !
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@Mr_Kink1 i think you’ve put across what I was trying to say initially, albeit in a far more eloquent way 
The bit about the person you were with, with a high libido, and that not working out is basically the point I was trying to make. It therefore strikes me as odd when people say things like they would ditch their partner if the sex frequency wasn’t what met their own needs. This is clearly for people who aren’t interested in anyone beyond themselves and I think it’s an incredibly odd basis for a relationship. It also begs the question how they’d feel if their partner said “you’re only here for my sexual pleasure” - probably awful, I’d imagine. I totally understand you have to have sexual compatibility and desire but I also don’t think you can have any kind of decent relationship primarily on that basis, certainly not for a life time.
Mine keeps up but ik ow she is tired so I’m trying to spice it up more so she would be begging for round two 
Have you got any children in your house?
I would love sex twice a day. But with kids we have to wait until they’re asleep.
If there is more than 1f guy having sex with the wife shw goes to the shed/gym in the back garden incase the kids wake up. It’s pretty comfortable, not like a wooden shed