Apprehensive about anal play

Sex Tips & Talk
1

Hey Guys.

My wife is a bit funny about me going anywhere near her anus and gets embarrassed, sometimes annoyed if I try and slide a finger inside.

But I can tell she really enjoys a vibrator around the entrance (at the same time as pussy play) or even my finger probing the entrance.

I know she has had a bad experience years ago (won’t reveal) but it’s somewhat of a guilty pleasure of hers.

She has straddled me for oral before and anally ridden the tip of my finger during oral - I think there is an element of needing to be in the mood.

I think she likes it but there is a barrier to it going any further.

Have you guys experienced this, and do yo have any suggestions?

J

2 Likes
2

Talk about it…it’s her barrier and sometimes when a person has a barrier they want to keep that barrier up no matter how much you try to convince them that maybe they should take it down…even if just for a short time…

She may surprise you and take it down in her own time…but if she feels you are pressuring her to before she is ready…this could possibly make things worse…

But talking could help her explain how she feels about it…I suggest not in the bedroom…at least you’ll know why one way or the other…

Good luck

4 Likes
3

My wife was very apprehensive about anal play but we took our time and built up to it. We started off with some smaller toys and then fingers etc.
Now she loves anal and I’m glad she does. If it had been a bad experience that would have been it.
I know your missus has had a bad experience in the past but let her know you are there to listen and build that confidence back up. Communication is key! I cannot stress that enough.

I really hope it all works out for you :pray:

2 Likes
4

I am always careful not to pressure but if she seems to be enjoying something new just go with the flow - if that makes sense?

2 Likes
5

Cheers man, I appreciate it. One thing I have noticed is that just after her time of the month when she is ovulating she is more horny/experimental

1 Like
6

I would just experiment with things. Have a nose here and see if there are any beginner toys you could get and above all just have some fun with it all.

7

One partner I was with for years…I was like no way…and I never did even though he tried to convince me otherwise…

Another partner I asked him to…because with him I wanted to…

It may just take time and for her to feel comfortable to try again after her bad experience…

3 Likes
9

Sounds like a situation of going slow and steady with having her let you know when she wants it in her own time, but I think what your already doing is ok by keep making suggestions towards it during play as that will allow the body communication to stay open between the both of you :slightly_smiling_face:

10

Slowly build up to it taking your cues from how she is responding, it might be where you are at, at the moment is as far as she is wanting to take it.