I normally have a plan for what I would to happen during sex and then my OH will then change them.
Depends. If we are doing something kinky we tend to plan it to make sure we do what we want during it.
We also plan stuff like massages.
Everything else? A mix of planned and unplanned
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pretty much always unplanned… my brain has an expectation that if we have a date night or special occasion then of course there should be sex, but my hubby’s brain doesn’t work like that
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After reading the comments you put to my question, I txt OH asking her what she wanted me to do to her at the weekend… First she put, “well I love it when you go down on me… but you always do that anyway.” Before i could reply, she sent another saying " I cant help but feel there’s something I’m not doing for you". I have been acting a bit different this week what with the whole banging one out in front of her thing. So I said that everything was fine and reiterated the question in a slightly different way… I didnt know she was really stressed at work and was not in the mood to focus on W/E sexy time… She replied “A big bottle of Pink Gin”… I should have txt back “Isnt that a bit big to go in!!”
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My OH likes to know when she’s having a bit but I much prefer a bit of spontaneity myself
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Communication really is everything and now you know she’s having a tough time in work, so pamper her this weekend and let her know that you’re there to lighten her load a bit. If she brings up sex then great, but show her with your actions that you just want to help her relax.
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Having two children in the house, working full time with all the stuff that goes with that it tends to be planned more than spontaneous. It’s unfortunate but it’s just how it is. Still great, date night tonight but it’s not that free flow for want of a better phrase when we first met 20 year’s ago.
However after 20 year’s we are definitely having more enjoyable fun now than 20 year’s ago!
10,000 hour’s practice and all.
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If we made plans I knew things would get steamy, but always loved the element of surprise
Have tried planned/scheduled play time. OH usually finds an excuse not to. Birthday and Christmas are it these days.
We don’t have an official schedule, but we tend to fall into patterns. For example, when my husband comes home, we often have “garage sex” for just the two of us.
Garage is one of the “no go” zones for kids (safety) and it locks from both sides with a key. Turn on the air compressor for cover noise and life is good.
Shower is also kind of a guarantee, and so is bedtime. So I guess it is more than 50% routine.
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We don’t have a schedule as such but it’s always fuck Friday night 
if were lucky (our youngest thinks sleep is for the weak and ends up in our bed every night) we give it a shot every night but it all depends on our little human no sexy time when his in our room