i am wanting to get back into anal sex with toys but have the fear it will hurt. I haven't done it for over 6 years since having kids but i'm wanting to slowly get back into it and also try butt plugs but i don't know where to start.i'd like to have some time in the shower but what would be the right type of lube for this,
Also to add i am female and have only even had anal sex with the hubby but he is in ill health so is unable to do this at this moment in time which explains to some extent why we stopped so im looking for alternatives while he is on the mend and hopefully get things back on track.
Hi, sounds fun. Just start with some small toys, I recommend a small circumference (4.5 inches or less) dildo and maybe a butt plug or two of similar diameter to start with, that is the average girth of a mans penis so shouldn’t be too uncomfortable at first though remember a mans penis is soft compared to most sex toy materials so it’s not exactly similar.
The best way to start is with fingers, once you can comfortable fit two all the way in then the aforementioned toys shouldn’t hurt much if at all. Don’t go crazy spendy on your first toys, if you continue your likely to outgrow them pretty quickly.
I like to recommend the Lovehoney beaded class dildo, it is rigid and hard but it’s just the right size for a beginner after a little warm up and the sensation of the beads thrusting in and out slowly or quickly can really help teach the muscles to relax. A great alternative for a quality toy on a budget is the Lovehoney Lifelike Lover dildo
For but plugs look to start around the same size as above, there are some good ones on LH, the Tbar based ones are probably most comfortable for a beginner and tend to stay in the best.
For lube in the shower get some Pjur concentrated silicone lube. It is ideal for wet play, but be aware it makes all hard surfaces like your bathtub or shower basin very slippery. It doesn’t wash off with water alone. I have found the Magic Eraser sponges work best to clean it off surfaces . A Hybrid and also petroleum lube could also work but are less persistent around water and the silicon makes your skin feel really nice. Putting lube inside is a great way to apply it if you pick up a lube launcher as well. Also remember pure silicone lube can react with pure silicone toys causing damage to them, although many high quality toys don’t react.
Also I recommend a douche of some sort, if your in the shower you could get a shower shot nozzle that works with the shower hose but if it’s just for light play then a simple 250-500ml douche bulb will be fine, administer it standing upright and expel the water after a couple minutes.
King girthy summed up everything so not much to add, but I would highly recommend you use a small douche beforehand. Iv found having a quick cleanse makes things far more comfortable and it’s a lot more hygienic.
I did originally find plugs to be quite uncomfortable with anal so I went for a slim vibe or dildo with a small girth as they tend to be one size all the way down the shaft and you don’t have to get over the bulbous head of a plug. But a starter plug with a generous amount of lube is a great start.
The basic douche is excellent and has served us well, and the basics slimeline butt plug is small enough to get things started without putting too much stress on you physically.
I can reccomend this, it is what i used to get into anal play and I still use it now, despite having a big collection of toys built up. The material is perfect for anal play and the shape and size, plus the non intimidating looks all help to make it a really pleasurable experience. The suction cup would also be great for use in the bath/shower. Also if you find you enjoy it and want to get something a little larger, this is still great to use as a warmup toy.
As for lube they reccomend water based, but I use Pjur backdoor relaxing anal lube which is silicone based and have had no issues. This would work much better than water based lube when used in a wet environment.
The only slight negative is that the material smells a bit, but it really doesnt bother me. It does also reduce a lot after a few uses and wash cycles.
Whatever toy you choose just remember to take it slowly and relax, I'm sure you will get right back into it!
i've got a few glass dildo's which are the same style as what you've shown thank you for the info it's really helped i've also got a glass butt plug and a metal one but seemed a little daunting with how hard and big they seem they've just been sat in my draw before i start using them i've just ordered these to start with then hopefully work my way up would love to really get back into it and surprice the other half
Those all look like excellent items to start with, a good diversity of sensations as well. You may find that but plug your hoping to work up to is surpassed rather quickly, maybe set your sights on something just a little larger. 5.5 inch circumference is where the journey sort of starts to becoming a girther lol!
And while you may not decide to go down that path too far, I will suggest that there is value to training yourself to accommodate at least around 6.5 -7 inch circumference because it means your really learning to control and relax those muscles and that will translate to anal sex, which will be easy to accommodate and you can focus on relaxing and contracting in rythm to your partners thrusts. I find relaxing on the way in and contracting on the way out feels pretty amazing for a guy, with the Gspot stimulation I bet it feels pretty good for a woman too.
Those all look like excellent items to start with, a good diversity of sensations as well. You may find that but plug your hoping to work up to is surpassed rather quickly, maybe set your sights on something just a little larger. 5.5 inch circumference is where the journey sort of starts to becoming a girther lol!
And while you may not decide to go down that path too far, I will suggest that there is value to training yourself to accommodate at least around 6.5 -7 inch circumference because it means your really learning to control and relax those muscles and that will translate to anal sex, which will be easy to accommodate and you can focus on relaxing and contracting in rythm to your partners thrusts. I find relaxing on the way in and contracting on the way out feels pretty amazing for a guy, with the Gspot stimulation I bet it feels pretty good for a woman too.
Thanks KingGrthy
bought a few dildo's with suction bases a good range of sizes to work on my hubby has cancer and is on chemo he knows im wanting to get back into anal again but he is unable to sustain erection so i thought this would help but doesn't know I've also bought this for once I've got the confidence to go bigger and hopefully he'll be able to join in even if he's unable to physically just hope i don't offend him as that's not the intention
I highly reccommend a video my SO pointed me towards on porn hub. It helped ALOT. I had never been interested in anal play because it hurt me whenever he tried to go anywhere near it but one night I was feeling pretty relaxed and he's persistent so I let him and it's been nothing but comfortable ever since. I can't post a link but it's called "Anal play 101 with Kenneth Play and Riley Reyes". Give it a watch and it a try with a finger/toy and lube and see how it goes! I hope it works for you as well as it worked for me!
I highly reccommend a video my SO pointed me towards on porn hub. It helped ALOT. I had never been interested in anal play because it hurt me whenever he tried to go anywhere near it but one night I was feeling pretty relaxed and he's persistent so I let him and it's been nothing but comfortable ever since. I can't post a link but it's called "Anal play 101 with Kenneth Play and Riley Reyes". Give it a watch and it a try with a finger/toy and lube and see how it goes! I hope it works for you as well as it worked for me!
Thank you Love-hiney
That was really helpful not what i was expecting i was half expecting a porno haha great help will share with the other half