Hi Lovehoney family, My wife an I have just started introducing a bit of anal play which so far has been rubbing the outside and a bit of rimming me on her. However the other night she was rubbing me and said about me having her stick a vibrator in me and I said yes if she wanted to I would be willing to try this (I say you have to try everything at least once) was met with her amazement as she thought I was going to say no.
However this will be a very first for both of us so was wondering if you have any tips on toys or lube as we have normal lube but seen anal lube and was wondering if this was just a gimmick and is really the same stuff in a different bottle.
Hi jayandrach – the most important thing to remember is to take it extremely slowly, use lots of lube and stop immediately if anything hurts or is uncomfortable. Try to relax as much as you can. It is always best to start with a beginners butt plug, small dildo or a finger - my Husband uses a glove when he does this so that afterwards you just turn it inside out and you have no worries about mess etc. We use these:-
It may take a couple of sessions before you are able to penetrate fully - just take as long as you need and build up very slowly. Just get used to playing with your fingers for a couple of sessions and enjoy those sensations before you try again - making sure you use lots of lube - this is essential. I personally use Sliquid Sassy or Lovehoney’s own Anal Lube for everything as they don’t contain any chemical nasties, glycerin or parabens and are slightly thicker than normal lube and long lasting, but there are lots of anal lubes on LH to choose from.
My advice other than lube is to keep a strong hold on that vibrator. Things can quickly dissapear. That's why butt plugs are shaped the way they are so they can't go to far. Plenty of butt plugs on this site to help you experiment and at great low prices. Always best to be safe.
My advice other than lube is to keep a strong hold on that vibrator. Things can quickly dissapear. That's why butt plugs are shaped the way they are so they can't go to far. Plenty of butt plugs on this site to help you experiment and at great low prices. Always best to be safe.
For beginners I would probably recommend cupid's itty bitty butt plug (added advantage - it also comes in black!) http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=16479 over the tracy cox one for the extra 0.5in girth (still only 3.5 total) and because it's so short - the ring makes it incredibly easy to use, especially if you don't really know what you're doing. It doesn't have an option for a vibrator though, where you can put a bullet in the tracy cox ones.
If you wanted to try something with beads, I'd highly recommend the Adrien Lastic beaded butt-plug, because it's shorter than most beads, the biggest one is 3.5" same as the cupid's plug, and you could get both on the 2-for-£15 deal. (There's also another Adrien Lastic plug that seems to be a similar shape to ones designed for prostate stimulation, not having one I can't comment on whether it works).
For something that vibrates, is small, and includes anal beads I think the bionic bullet beaded anal wand would be a good choice http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=23981 , you could use as much or as little as you like, you can change the bullet in it if you wanted to try a different one, and while it SAYS the circumference is 4", in reality that's only the largest bead which I couldn't fit due to length, the rest of it is much smaller. For me that made it disappointing - I thought that most of the beads were 4" and the last one was even bigger, but for a beginner it would be good.
One thing I'd recommend is not moving up too quickly from the smaller measurements, I jumped from 3.5-4.9 as it was labelled "medium". Mediums vary extremely, (some are bigger than other brand's large!) and I found 1.5" extra girth can make too much difference.
Forgot to say - I always just use normal lube for anal play, but I go very slowly, e.g. one bead in and out a couple of times a minute, so it doesn't dry out. I prefer it because it feels slicker to me than the thicker lubes like the maximus, but for anything involving much thrusting you might want a thicker one that won't dry out so fast - some people like silicone for this reason, if you choose that make sure you're not using it with silicone toys as it can damage them.
i do reverse cowgirl with my husband and then with a lubed finger it just slips in whilst gentley rocking on his cock , makes it so much more intense for him .
I also have a strap on to use on him which he loves (i put a towel underneath so i don't get sticky sheets)
Anal is amazing whether giving or receiving. I started on the wife years ago and we both loved it. Funnily enough it was her who actually did me digitally first and that made me go for her. Yep I loved it but it wasn't until now, some fifteen plus years later that she has really started to go for it and go for it big time. It is amazing what you can accomodate after a little practice. She can even fist me now past her wrist but you might need to build up to that.
Start out small, work your way up, use plenty of lube as everyone says. We have used and use a variety of lubes and they all seem to do the trick . Glass dildos are great as well such as
but don't be too afraid of size as you progress. There are almost two points. One the entry and then as you go a bit further another restriction point cauased I think by the pelvic bone. You can and will get past it over time and if that is what you want.
My OH prefers a finger to warm her up rather than a toy (she mostly leaves the toys for me!).
You are embarking on an amazing experience, and it's something that initially my OH was against, but something that she has instigated fairly recently and it has added a new dimension to our love making.