Me and my OH have been together 3 years and we are very adventurous. Lots of toys, anal, latex and fetish stuff but I just suck at hand jobs!!!
I know technique is very individual but it is something that doesn't feel very comfortable to me. I can't even masturbate myself with my hand and have to use a toy :( I have asked him to guide me but he's not a very good teacher.
Does anyone have any ideas? I'd love to pleasure him in this way but so far my attempts have been extremely unde-rwheleming (sp?). I'm just glad that i can suck instead of shake or i'd be completely useless haha ;)
Hi charly I prefer if the hand moves in a sort of twist up And down motion with just the right grip so as U can slip down to caress the bollocks occasionally x
Hi charly
I prefer if the hand moves in a sort of twist up
And down motion with just the right grip so as
U can slip down to caress the bollocks occasionally x
This. Twisty wanks are something I can offer to the OH that is different from his own technique. Men are experts at hand jobs so just experiment and play around with pressure and different movements :)
use some lube and just circle the head of his glans and frenulum (tnx alice)....... as he gets harder press harder (in a circle if that makes sense) for me the sensation is better than any BJ apart from the fetish thing about her taking me in the mouth.
Not going too fast at the start! A lot of women seem to start off at a hundred miles an hour, build up to a fast speed with lots of slow twisting movements up and down the shaft, cup the balls too!
i find that my OH jumps into it too fast as well. take your time its not a race. sometimes think shes going to rip it off lol. also playin with the balls is overlooked a lot. i like them being squeezed pulled or spanked (which my oh loves to do)
I definitely agree with the twisting motion, my OH loves this. But i think the thing is to use different speeds & grip.
Use both hands, i usually start of teasing the inside of his thighs, then lightly run my finger over his perineum (skin between bum & balls) then up his cock. Pay attention to his balls :) squeeze them gently, cup them in your hand & use a sort of circualr motion with your fingers... almost rolling them in your hand if that makes sense?
Also listen to him, when you hear him moan it means you are doing something right, if he has been quiet for too long, change it up a bit.
I often find starting off with a few fingers holding him lightly, really touch him lightly making sure to tease the tip, i find it helps if i use my mouth to get him nice and wet too. before gradually building it up to a more intense speed and if you find something that works for your men, don't over do it but pull it out when you really need it. x
I found this difficult to start with as well, but with a little practice, you'll get it.
Try using lube, and be really gentle, use both hands, and play with his balls at the same time.
If your really struggling, ask him to hold his hand over yours, and get him to move your hand, so you can feel what pressure to use, and what rythme he likes.
It changes with me, sometimes I like her to do it really fast other times really slow, sometimes with lube and sometimes without. It just depends on my mood at the time I suppose.
It might sound silly but ask him to give himself a handjob why you watch (and take notes - but maybe not photos or a film!!) This way you can see what he does and enjoys and then take it from there.
My OH has asked me to tell her what I like and I feel a right moron saying "up a bit", "down a bit" "faster", "slower" etc.
But one thing which is a massive turn off for me it letting go immediately after orgasm. I need to be wound down afterwards.
My partner has a bit of trouble with this as well, there have been times when she as had a grip on me which is fine then she has started to move her hand & she has pulled the skin down too far ouch is all I can say.
To be honest I would say just take it gently with him & ask him how things felt afterwards listening to his responses during will be a bit of a helping hand (sorry for the bad pun) we are all different when it comes to desires.
perfecting my handjob saved my sex life with my OH, he had never been able to cum by anothers touch and so this was a real mission for him/me and something i needed to work hard on so i sympathise with you, thankkfully ive cracked it and him and we havent looked back now.
For me although i was expereinced i did become nervous about how much pressure/ speed he likes so i did like others point out watch him do it to himself covertly over a few times, im a fan of the twist as it gives different sensations, but i also treated them initally as cock massages, get really lubed up or with baby oil (as long as your not using condoms after) and really play, tease and pamper that cock, this way you get to explore doing all different things and gage reactions.
However my sevret of what ultimately perfected and helped us was a tenga egg which i have just wrote my review for TENGA Egg Twister&reviewid=44168#customer_reviews this allowed a different and intense sensation for him, but allowed me to handle him vigerously which i was frightened to do before, eventually once i got competent at handling him this way until orgasm and worked out exactly what he liked and when, i then was able to perfect this wihout the egg.
most of all dont make it into a big deal if either of you feel pressurised it will impact upon both of your enjoyment x
You need to find what he likes best - it's a very personal thing!
What works for me is plenty of lube cos I'm very tightly circumcised and then a firm grip with fingers going up the back of my shaft rubbing the area where my frenulum was excised and then carrying on up over my slit and right round to the front of my glans - and then back again. Also love having my bollocks played with too to stop them disappearing off inside my abdomen somewhere!
