Apart from my LH family my FBF is the only person who knows I’m gay, well even though ive told her this because im happily married shes still convince I Bi, It was one of our normal talk about my sexuality conversations and as she’s the only who knows even though we’re both convinced my wife thinks im Bi she says I’m still in the closet where I feel because I’ve come out to her and others don’t need to know I’m no longer in the closet, so just interested what my LH family think and how much in the closet am I and is she right?
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You are so far in the closet you’re in Narnia 
Bi or Gay maybe a good idea to talk to your other half.
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You are definitely not alone in this! After 27 years married (during which my wife has ‘semi seriously asked me if I was gay) I did very recently admit to being ‘probably bisexual’, I think it’s more accurate to describe it as what is now called ‘heteroflexible’. I sometimes fantasies about an MMF threesome where I get play with the other man, particularly sucking their cock.
I know it will never happen, but when she gets her Strap-on out I do give it a suck which feels way better than it logically should!
All this came from a series of honest chats about what we like/don’t like from a sexual perspective. Not something to do during the ad break in her favourite show, it takes time away from home/kids/work to allow the space and mindset to be in the right place.
Not easy and it feels like a huge risk, you know your situation better than anyone, what is your desired ‘goal’ here.?
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This is such a complicated one. Does you wife turn you on sexually? Does any women? Do you love your wife or are you in love with her? 2 very different types if love in my book. Are you happy in your marraige?
These are things you need to ask yourself. If youre not then youre wasting each others time. I think you need to talk to her as at the moment she is in a marraige without all the facts. Its deceiving in a sort of a way as her feelings may be different if she knew.
Without sounding harsh, this is something that needs to be addressed with her personally now rather than with friends and on forums. Youve sought out advice and opinions which is fine but if it was me Id be so sad if i found out that my husband had discussed this elsewhere and then not spoke to me.
Good luck with it. You both deserve to be happy 
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Your only as far in a closet as you think you are, unless you’ve got a walk in wardrobe! 
But in theory if your wife was to come to you this evening and say “hey bubbles, are you gay?”, how would you respond to her?
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Hi @Yes_man, remember your previous post about your FBF suggesting being open to your wife was the right thing to be done. I think my response on this one is pretty much the same as before, it really comes down to how you feel.
I’m sure I recall that you love your wife, have a great connection, and although being gay, find your wife sexually attractive because of her looks.
Your FBF is entitled to her opinion, of course she is. Reality, though, is it is what you feel and think that actually matters. In the closet, out the closet, halfway between, isn’t it irrelevant? You are where you are, does it need a label?
If you are both happy and comfortable in your marriage, you love her, she loves you, and you’re entirely comfortable suppressing any urges of male sexual activity, the closet is irrelevant.
The big question is if you want to commit to carrying on as things are long term. If you are, till death do us part, no worries. If it’s going to be a scratch that needs itching, thats a different ballgame entirely.
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@AJSTAR Funny you should say that, we was out with my FBF for lunch a few days ago and after a story about someone I work with thinking her boyfriend was Bi my wife “jokingly” but my FBF wasn’t sure if it was meant jokingly, asked if I was Bi, apparently my FBF said I went bright red, looked away and didn’t deny anything, I also didnt hear my FBF say “well are you” as she thought it was a good opportunity for me to come out and then in a joking way to my Wife, “its a bit late to ask now” as she’s still convinced my wife has her suspicions, for me it’s still to big a risk especially for other reasons. XxX
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Honesty is always the best policy for a relationship to work you need to talk and be honest so if your both looking at your relationship in different ways as you don’t know all the facts about each other then it’s not fair on either of you, but everyone will always have a different opinion, but you should really talk to her after now getting advice from your FBF and a community like this, no matter the circumstances, if there is kids involved whatever it is that makes it harder just be honest and talk. I wish you the best of luck and hopefully you both come out better/stronger people from it.
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Haha well I’d say that’s like a prime example of being in the closet still 
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I’m a bit confused by this post. Gay, bi or otherwise, your first duty (to my thinking) would be to be completely honest and open with your wife; she deserves that much at the very least, otherwise the whole relationship is built on a lie. If she suspects your preferences as you say, and if your marriage is as happy as you say, then it shouldn’t be too hard to admit your orientation…?