Hi Guys and Girls,
I'm interested on anyones tips on how to finger, I want to make my OH ecstatic using just my fingers, in the past I've been semi successful, reading some tips on the internet I think my issue maybe not using any lubricant.
Anyway, I would be interested if there was anyone out there with some sure fire tips!
Thanks in advance!
It all depends on what your OH likes.
use plenty of lubricant and make sure your hands and nails are trimmed and nice and smooth. nothing worse than the feeling of cracked hands and sharp nails.
theres not many threads directly discussing fingering but i found this one waay back in the archives which might help? http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/community/forums/sex-tips-and-talk/49586-i-just-dont-enjoy-fingering/
i'd read up a bit on g spot stimulation as well if you are trying internal stimulation http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/s.cfm?department=community&term=g+spot&s=all
above all ask your lady what she likes, or watch her masturbate using only her fingers, that should give you some ideas
I agree with what SL says. Clean, tidy, trimmed nails are a must! Lube makes everything feel better! A favourite of ours is http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=7163
As us woman are all different what works for me might not work for your girlfriend. The only way to find out is to ask her! I think the key to great sex of any kind is communication.
Thanks for the tips, maybe I should have said this first, she doesn't masterbate herself at all, and doesn't really know what she does or doesn't like, so I've kind of planned to have an evening of experimentation with her in order to try and find out!!
So I'm mainly looking for tips as to what worked for people, I guess so I can test them, so if it works and if not move on until we find the right match. As it stands she doesn't really get a lot from it, but it does make her wet. I think lube maybe the answer.
For me if no toys are involed i need lots and lots of lube, even if im really wet anyway, you can never be too wet! as others have said, nicely trimmed nails are a must. dont jump staright in to it (literally)
Inner thights, stroking over underwear very gently, affectionate sighs and groans to show you love doing it for her, tell her how beautifull she is, remmeber to pay attention to her boobs too, neck kissing goes along way for me too. Once the pants come off still dont go straight in, keep stroking and teasing, when you do go for it, don't go straight for her clit, make sure you pay attention to all of her bits, be very gentle and slide in one finger, take out, rub around to spread her moisture (haha what a fab word !) go in again, pay attention to her reactions, for me after this its pretty much index and middle finger in, thumb on clit, ring finger and pinkie brushing against my bum and being slow and sensual, sometimes its nice to go harder but hopefully she'd tell you if she wanted it harder?! for me this results in a grinding, sweaty, swearword fuelled screaming orgasm, but everyones different O, and also, again, just for me, but maybe others too?! if she starts grinding around and making little noises to show shes liking it, tell her you love the noises she makes and how sexy she is, it just gets me going quicker, lots of luck, let us know how it goes :) xx
I agree with MissOrgasm. I love it when my OH starts on me whilst looking up at me.. kissing my neck, boobs, face etc. It makes it just a little more special and intimate. (I was blown away by her details though- I think she got it in one!)
Stimulating the peripheral areas will really increase her wanting more down there. It's all connected.
Get the mood right and you're on your way!
Since she's lacks experience in sole play I think she'd benefit from starting lightly. Also remember to communicate! If there's something that she doesn't like tell her to tell you. It's all part of experimenting and exploring your bodies. Perhaps she'd like mutual masturbation?
Enjoy! =]
x X x wrote:
I agree with MissOrgasm. I love it when my OH starts on me whilst looking up at me.. kissing my neck, boobs, face etc. It makes it just a little more special and intimate. (I was blown away by her details though- I think she got it in one!)
Stimulating the peripheral areas will really increase her wanting more down there. It's all connected.
Get the mood right and you're on your way!
Since she's lacks experience in sole play I think she'd benefit from starting lightly. Also remember to communicate! If there's something that she doesn't like tell her to tell you. It's all part of experimenting and exploring your bodies. Perhaps she'd like mutual masturbation?
Enjoy! =]
yeah i did get quite in to it haha, suprised i can remember what its like to be fair, its been longer than is humane xx
Now we know why they call her Miss Orgasm!
Paddy89 wrote:
Now we know why they call her Miss Orgasm!
hahaha proper made me laugh :) it was a nickname given to me by the first "man" i slept with haha
The advice above seems fantastic, but I thought I'd add my thoughts too.
For me, I love it when my Husband stands/lays/sits behind me and brings his arms around me to touch me. I much prefer this to just laying there and him being at t'other end of the bed or whatever. It's really sensual and gorgeous and gets me really turned on! It may not be ideal if you're trying to judge her facial expressions or see what your doing etc, but you can kiss her neck and whisper sweet nothings (or filthy somethings!) into her ear, and it just might be a nice and gentle way to experiment... She may also feel like she can 'let go' if you're not looking at her?
They have mixed reviews, but maybe a tingle or warming lube would add a different sensation too? The Play Lube set from Durex is quite a good way to sample the different types... http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=5349
Have fun!
MrsP x
Thanks everyone, I think where I've been going wrong in the past is not being gentle enough to start with, so taking everything into account, and not being to detailed my plan is as follows. Around 9pm (after the baby is in bed!) I'm going to take her upstairs and strip her off, get her to lay on the bed and give her a full body massage for around 30 minutes.
Once shes nice and relaxed, I'm going to move into the experimentation stage. I was thinking of blindfolding her first, as in the past this has excited her and may remove some inhibitions...plus if you can't see whats happening I find it enhances the feeling/suprise! What Miss Orgasm suggested as what she likes sounds pretty hot, so I'll going to start there and try other things as we go and see how she reacts.
I was thinking of trying this lube which I already have, but I also have a normal flavoured lube:
http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=20166
Has anyone used it? (ladies, I've tried it on myself already) does the tingling do anything for you?
I'm up for the idea of mutual masterbation x X x, but not for tonight, it's all about her tonight and making her feel good, my sex drive is way higher than my OHs and sometimes I think she feels a bit like shes letting me down, so I think if I can show her it's not just about me maybe it will help.
Oh yeah, I started the ball rolling by sending some roses to her work place earlier!
JonnyBeBad wrote:
Thanks everyone, I think where I've been going wrong in the past is not being gentle enough to start with, so taking everything into account, and not being to detailed my plan is as follows. Around 9pm (after the baby is in bed!) I'm going to take her upstairs and strip her off, get her to lay on the bed and give her a full body massage for around 30 minutes.
Once shes nice and relaxed, I'm going to move into the experimentation stage. I was thinking of blindfolding her first, as in the past this has excited her and may remove some inhibitions...plus if you can't see whats happening I find it enhances the feeling/suprise! What Miss Orgasm suggested as what she likes sounds pretty hot, so I'll going to start there and try other things as we go and see how she reacts.
I was thinking of trying this lube which I already have, but I also have a normal flavoured lube:
http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=20166Has anyone used it? (ladies, I've tried it on myself already) does the tingling do anything for you?
I'm up for the idea of mutual masterbation x X x, but not for tonight, it's all about her tonight and making her feel good, my sex drive is way higher than my OHs and sometimes I think she feels a bit like shes letting me down, so I think if I can show her it's not just about me maybe it will help.
Oh yeah, I started the ball rolling by sending some roses to her work place earlier!
you utterly lovely man you. good luck :)
Roses to her work place
As for that lube - I find it makes me feel 'cool' down there, like, as if there's a breeze or something! I didn't dislike it, or like it, but I guess it did make me more aware of what I was feeling down there. Depends how sensitive she is really... Maybe use a tiny bit and judge her reaction before applying loads!
Tingle lube *possibly* a bad move. Some people love it (and it's definitely worth trying at some point), but many more wince at the thought of it after a bad experience!
It can be gentle tingling or "oh-my-goodness" pain!
I'd say save it for a time when you can test it properly without potentially ruining the mood by having to wash it all off!
If you're really interested in a tingle - this is much more subtle http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=20168 and possibly a better place to start.
Adxx
MissO what a description! You had me going there!
I agree with Alicia, Tingle lube seems to be the marmite of lubes, you either love it or hate it so might be an idea to leave it for another night.
Good luck Jonny and hope you have a fab night tonight, be sure and let us know how it goes! x
sexy little minx wrote:
MissO what a description! You had me going there!
I agree with Alicia, Tingle lube seems to be the marmite of lubes, you either love it or hate it so might be an idea to leave it for another night.
Good luck Jonny and hope you have a fab night tonight, be sure and let us know how it goes! x
iv got myself going! damn it i want some loving now! x
Thanks again everyone, I'll skip the tingle lube, I have a great idea for another occasion to try that one which will be better suited!!
Well I think I'm ready, I feel a little nervous, but you know I always figure whats the worst that can happen...(now I'm thinking about the Dr Pepper adverts)
if the finger fails....try the tonuge that way you go along lips,and work around clit then slip your tonuge in 2 her.
I'd love to Vinny, unfortunatly I broke my jaw a while back and so it limits my oral performance somewhat, which is why I was mainly interested in finger techniques!
Alicia D'amore wrote:
Tingle lube *possibly* a bad move. Some people love it (and it's definitely worth trying at some point), but many more wince at the thought of it after a bad experience!
It can be gentle tingling or "oh-my-goodness" pain!
I'd say save it for a time when you can test it properly without potentially ruining the mood by having to wash it all off!
If you're really interested in a tingle - this is much more subtle http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=20168 and possibly a better place to start.
Adxx
Hehe, this reminds me that I read about a couple of bad experiences in another thread during the day on New Years Eve, and by chance the subject of durex lube came up in conversation when I was out that evening. Seems its a common problem, as one of my friends used it once with a partner and apparantly had to stop and run herself under the tap External Media Not the most intimate of moments, I'm sure!
