Loaning your oh out

Has anyone ever loaned there OH out to someone to have sex,

Nope, took me too much effort to claim him as my own. Not giving him to anyone for anything. It would break my heart I think.

Is this a general enquiry or are there circumstances where you are considering it and looking advice?

Loaned? Do you mean in exchange for something such as money? Or simply allowing him to have sex with others?

I haven't done this and I never would. I think it would ruin our relationship as I wouldn't be able to look at him the same. If it's something that interests both of you though and you think you can handle the feelings that come with it, then go ahead. Just be absolutely positive before anything happens!

NatandTom wrote:

Loaned? Do you mean in exchange for something such as money? Or simply allowing him to have sex with others?

+1

I too think clarification is needed here.

If my OH did that to me then she would get trampled on from the stampede! .............

Only joking ![](upload://ez5kOkpKXRZOxjavAURYmQxVTau.gif)

On a more serious note the only way IMO this could be done without risk of damage to an existing relationship is done say within the environemnt of a swingers club.

I think questions need to be asked as to why either of you want this to happen in the first place.

There is a thread along a similar subject: 

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/community/forums/sex-tips-and-talk/1477130-being-shared-by-my-partner/

Is this what you are too referring to? 

I only loan him out for foot massages he gives amazing foot massage, its something a lot of my girl friends have taken advantage of.

Well it depends for me I think it would break a marriage but then there are swing clubs and other out there that do swap partner for stranger. It depends how you and your partner feel about this topic. I would say if you want good marriage then you need banderinglines that you must not cross. I hope this helps?

Well it depends for me I think it would break a marriage but then there are swing clubs and other out there that do swap partner for stranger. It depends how you and your partner feel about this topic. I would say if you want good marriage then you need banderinglines that you must not cross. I hope this helps?

I only ask as I have a dilemma, my sis lost her oh several years ago now and has ! Shall we say struggled to get back on the horse, last night out she dropped hints with plenty drink I may add

Still at it at 50 plus wrote:

I only ask as I have a dilemma, my sis lost her oh several years ago now and has ! Shall we say struggled to get back on the horse, last night out she dropped hints with plenty drink I may add

Oh dear lord no. I think that is extremely dangerous territory, particularly if she's vulnerable at the moment.

Perhaps direct her to FAB (btw members of that site get 10% off here!) - that way she could find her way back on the horse, without the risk of ruining your relationship by sleeping with your OH.

If my sister asked I would laugh out of sheer confusion. There are many many many single folk out there without having eyes for your brother in law.

Still at it at 50 plus wrote:

I only ask as I have a dilemma, my sis lost her oh several years ago now and has ! Shall we say struggled to get back on the horse, last night out she dropped hints with plenty drink I may add

I wouldn't worry about this too much unless she repeats the request while she is sober- people routinely say things they don't mean while drunk after all. She could have been joking but it came out a bit too seriously, or it could have been an errant thought that she would be mortified to know slipped out. Does she even remember?

In any case there are plenty of better ways for her to 'get back on the horse' through properly no strings attached sex, which I really don't think it could be if she had sex with your partner. Perhaps you could help her find someone rather than simply loan your partner to her? Or since we're on Lovehoney, you could treat her to a little something she can use solo to get back to full confidence with her own body and desires before she brings in another person?

Historically and culturally this has happened due to death of one siblings partner in the past, however those are often for other reasons such as children, religion or even law.

Personally, I've found things like this cause tension in family relationships.

I highly agree to waiting to see if it comes up as a regular theme when drunk and then discuss it when sober. It may just be an inner fantasy she would normally want to keep to herself but cues from drinking, emotions, and of course the booze may have let the idea slip.

I agree with both the advice on waiting to see of she brings it up again and encouraging her to try online dating. Websites like OkCupid, Plenty of Fish and Tinder are free to join and full of people looking to date. I'd see if you could give her confidence to set up a profile on one of those sites, maybe help her take a nice photo or write a bio, before going down the partner sharing route. Hope this is helpful.

I would try it the old fashioned way. Go out with her to town center pubs on a typical Friday Night if you live in a fairly largish town or city. There are plenty of guys out there chasing a smaller number of women . It will also get her to open up a bit more .From my own experience its not unusual these days for the woman to make the first move .It may be a good idea to brush up on body language as well. There are quite a few videos on You Tube on the subject although its usually the women who are tops when it comes to body language .

Thanks for all the comments, but decided to tell hubby, his reply has answered all my thoughts and dilemmas, his reply, and I quote!! Tell your " expletive " sister to get a "expletive " life, and don't ever "expletive " invite her "expletive " round here again, never herd him use that kind of language as much every before, thanks again for all your insight, merry christmas

The only time I've heard of this is in a ds relationship. I'm not surprised your oh reacted as he did. Understandably you love and feel for your sister but this would seriously be asking for trouble if this went ahead. If it were me I wouldn't be happy if one of my siblings ever suggested this my hubby is mine all mine. Show her the toys on here to help her along until she gets a man of her own and you give her the cuddles she is missing 😊