hey I'm wanting to try roughin things up in the bed room and not sure how to go about it I haven't spoke to my hubby bout it how would i even start just looking for some tips where how to start x
You just ask him if he'd ever though of it or would like to do it, start small, hair pulling, holding hands down that sort of thing, don't buy any restraints or hitty things before speaking to him. If he says he doesn't want to then drop it, you've put the thought in his mind, if he wants to he'll bring it up again one day, if not, don't pester
I'd suggest just opening a conversation with him about it - tell him the sort of things that you think you might like to try, and see if he has similar desires. Good starting activities once you've discussed things with him might be light spanking, restraints, or sub/Dom roleplays.
Have an open conversation with him ask him to try something you want and see if he's willing to. Don't forget if he does try something let him know how it felt and if you liked it or not. Then have more fun experimenting. I found out along time ago that I liked sex quite rough believe it or not
Prior to having the talk - i would suggest you build a wishlist for youself on here that would include regular toys and a couple of starter items for rough play and show him your list. Then have the talk and if he's positive about the items on your wishlist , then suggest he make his own wishlist [allow him some time on his own to do the list] - then have a look - you may actually be surprised with what his list may include.
good luck
Personally I would say, have a chat first.
Oh go in for the suprise, tell him to get comfortable in the bedroom, and that *you wont be long` Dress up in a sexy out fit. Hide some silk scarves under the pillows and maybe even a blind fold. Then.....POUNCE
Elements of suprise, its could go AMAzing then it it coukd go terribly wrong, depending if your OH dont like spice and change in the bedroom department
thank you all for your advice but now I feel a bit of a tool I've found out my husband has bin cheating so maybe I was to late to try and change and excite things up between us but thank you all for your help x
Really sorry to hear that you've been cheated on kinky wife :(
its probably a bit too raw at the moment, but when you're ready to talk to your OH, may be good to know if it was a one-time thing in a moment of weakness (still awful, but perhaps salvageable) or if he's been playing away repeatedly.
Dont blame yourself though, he chose to cheat!
Hugs x
So sorry to hear that kinky wife, and like Luv bunny has said you must not blame yourself hun. Hugs! X
Oh shit :/ don't blame yourself, you went out of your way to help your relationship while he went out if his way to help himself. Cut all the left sleeves off his shirts ;) (of course I'm joking... Or am I?)
Young and fun95 wrote:
Cut all the left sleeves off his shirts ;) (of course I'm joking... Or am I?)
thanks that has made me smile my heads just up my arse I have 3amazing kids with him how can he do this I just don't know what to do x
Or cut nipple holes in them :P
you have three amazing kids, them and you are what matters, depending on what happened it may be rescuable, if you want it to be, if he was drunk and a woman seduced him and he had a moment of weakness, went back to hers, realised what he'd done, thrown up, fallen at your feet crying for forgiveness maybe you could, but if he'd searched someone out or had a relationship then walk out with your head held high, you deserve better
Aw, bless you, this is never going to be nice, but especially awful when you were trying to do something nice for the both of you.
There are lots if folk on here who are super friendly and full of lots of advice. I suspect we have those who have made it through infidelity stronger than ever, and those who have walked away and started again. So if you need to chat it doesn't have to be about sex toys and lingerie.
Have you managed to talk to him at all about what happened or is it all a little to fresh for that yet?
*big hugs*
x
+1 to what young and fun said, very good advice. X
I really hope you can sort this out, but please think of yourself. X
no he works nights at a warehouse its some woman he works with he said it was a one off but how can I trust him or believe him now and he works with her seeing her 5days a week I don't no If I can cope with that I suffered with depression after having my son I cant go bk there I don't think I could trust him again but I love him in just so confused
thank you so much I have bin with him since I was 15 10 years we've bin together its nice to no I have some where to turn to all my friends are mutual friendsx
I don't think you can recover from that without you suffering. I understand you love him but do you think he loves you? Do you think you deserve to be treated this way? How did you find out? If you don't mind me asking
Bless ya.. I can't begin to imagine what you are going through.... **HUGE HUGS **
I think young and fun on point here, how does he seem?! Did he tell you he had cheated or did ye find out?! You need time and space from him really think bout what's gone on and his reactions since you know.. Like if you think this is going to happen again,imo u are better off to walk for the sake of your own head and your children.. Easier said than done hence the well needed head space but in the long run the right decision as you'll end up a paranoid mess which isn't fair on you...
I hope you find the correct solution and I'm sending hugs and loads of pma ur way xxxxxxxxxx
Oh bless you, what a difficult situation. If you were ever to trust him again he has a long way to go to rebuild that, so you need to know whether he is prepared for that, if you were wanting to go down that road.
You are young though, and you could have a bright time ahead of you on your own once you've healed. I have just left a 1o year marriage, not for the same reason though. It was hard, and I never expected to be a single mum starting out on my own, but I am doing it and realsing I'm stronger than I ever thought. We women are made of tough stuff, sometimes we never even know how tough.
x
to your first question I don't no if he loves me he says he does but if he does how can he do this to me /us no I don't deserve to be treated like this nobody does he told me this morning but I have 3 kiddies to look after so I couldn't get into it with him I just want to to have my marriage bk the way it was b4 this happened we've not even bin married a year