Premature ejaculation

Sex Tips & Talk
1

Hi all

Bit of a sensitive topic but have any of you had trouble with premature ejaculation ?

When I was 18 to 24 I was like an animal in the sack superb staying power going hard and fast for as long as I wanted to. However the past two years have been troublesome finishing way to early some times 2 mins and that was my lot
This left me feeling less of a man and frustrated and so so embarrassed. Has anyone had the same problems and how did you get over it ?

Thanks for takeing the time to read this post

Rich

2

Hello :) my partner also has PE and it doesn't bother me at all.

we've tried a few delay sprays and creams but find they don't work for us, I find the best thing is if I just tell him to slow down and take his time he has ADHD witch also makes him get excited fast but by telling him to slow down take your time don't rush he can last pretty long. X

3

Sounds daft but its good to know I'm not on my own it doesn't my partner either but it's just frustrating if we plan something lol. Thank you for the reply :-)

4

My partner has this too hun but I really don't mind. I think a lot of it is down to the amount of oral sex I give him before sex but I reallly enjoy that so I'm not going to stop lol The Doc Johnson delay cream I tried recently was very good so you could try some of that? My partner thinks it is all in his head though and is probably right. I think if he stopped beating himself up about it it would probably stop xx

5

One thing I discovered though my former issues with ED is that, paradoxically, it is much more difficult to control an orgasm when not fully erect. Conversely, having done a lot of pelvic floor exercises in recent years I now have far harder erections and I find it very easy to control my orgasms for as long as I want.

I have read of other people who have experienced the same effect so it might be worth considering PF exercises.

6

It's a crazy thing to have I tried a delay gel but it made us both numb lol it's good stuff I did a review on it and as for the forplay she's not that big on it but she's coming round.

7

I also get this also sometimes.

I think because I get turned on so much and if I've got without for so long I can find myself PE'ing

Because I'm on testosterone injections i can find myself being able to keep going.
Also plenty of oral and bringing toys into it can help a lot. I find that with myself.

But don't feel down about it. Pretty sure man wasnt created to go on for hours in bed lol

8

Thanks for the tip regarding the PF exercise

9

Personally I hate sex to go on for too long.. I like lots of foreplay and then a nice quickie to end it with :) If my partner lasted for ages I would get bored, sore and wonder what on earth I was doing wrong lol

As long as your partner is happy I don't think PE is an issue xx

10

I can and have always lasted for hours when me and the OH have "normal" sex but when we have a fetish or bondage night im that turned on I often suffer with PE, but to be honest that can also be said for the OH, also doesn't take her as long to cum, my OH says she doesn't mind if I only last a couple of minutes as she says it's her doing her thing properly and it pleases her that she has such an affect in me!

11

I think you need to learn to pay attention to how your body works. Just before you ejaculate, there's a point of no return. Learn at what point this is, and stop before you reach it.

The easiest way to do this is to masturbate. Don't look on this particular session as leading to an orgasm, look at is as learning the language of your body. Pay attention to what it feels like in the 30ish seconds before you orgasm. You'll probably feel a sensation of pressure building, or tightening in your body/genitals, before you actually ejaculate. When you start to feel this happening, stop touching yourself and just feel the sensations going on. Get used to what it feels like. There's also a point, likely less than 5 seconds before you actually ejaculate, where the sensations change.

The more and more you do this, the more you'll be aware of the signal from your body that you're going to ejaculate soon. By paying attention to this signal, you'll be able to learn some control and stop yourself at that point. It's like turning a kettle off before it boils. You can see lots of bubbles and steam coming off, but it's not actually boiled. You can wait for the kettle to cool down and then start again.

Bit more info at Wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orgasm_control

Don't beat yourself up about this. Bodies change as they get older, and you also get used to what works and likely do more of that, while doing less of what doesn't. You're just efficient at orgasming, that's all. ;) You can absolutely learn a new technique, though. An added bonus is more intense orgasms, as you'll feel your body and its sensations more.

12

I am guessing you would be surprised to know that the "average" amount of time a guy can last continually thrusting is between 2 and 5 minutes. You say sometimes it is as low as 2 minutes, so I assume at most other times its higher. I don't think you have premature ejaculation as such, I think you just suffer with what almost every man feels, that they cum before their partner, or too soon for their liking. You sound completely normal for a male. Of course, it is possible to train yourself to last half an hour or whatever you target time is.

I think porn depicts men lasting 20/30 minutes but bare in mind, they are not constant thrusting, they are also probably not that turned on, so much so they need to stop and wank to get hard again, they have cameras and lights in their face etc, plus, yes they have trained themselves. Porn is not like life though. I have been with a few guys who have got this training down to a fine art. They could go for hours. It chafed me raw and I was thoroughly fecking bored with it. One guy would do 5 minutes in one position, flip me over, 5 minutes in another, and so on. Was I thrilled at having a partner who could do that? No I was bored and sore. He thought he was a stud. lol

Most of my partners have fallen somewhere within the 2 to 5 minute mark, that is, they would ejaculate within that time, sometimes sooner, if they did not stop thrusting. I MUCH prefer these lovers. I actually have a bit of a fetish for "premature" I find it a massive turn on. I understand in the guys head he feels shitty, but to be I feel like it is a compliment to my skills. Maybe we are both wrong in our thoughts (In other words maybe he should not feel so shit because it is quite normal and I shouldn't feel like it is a huge compliment as it would probably happen with any girl lol) but still, I find it a huge turn on to know my guy is close to orgasm while we play. It pushes me closer to orgasm too, knowing how horny he is.

If you feel like you are unsatisfactory, well, I have experienced two types of men. The ones who continue to pleasure the woman even if they cum early, and the ones who roll away and fall asleep. If you are one of the first, then you seriously have NOTHING to worry about! However, if you leave her high and dry a lot, or cannot bring yourself to pleasure her after, you might want to ensure she cums first, with oral, toys, fingers, even get her really, really close and then start penetration.

There are ways to train yourself to last longer though, if you wish, I suggest trying these techniques:

1) First, try to find a way to relax and reduce the worry about it. Its well known that anxiety/stressing about it actually can make it worse, or keeps it going. If it happens, try to brush it off and try again another time and really try not to let it bother you if you can. If you focus on it....well, it kinda stays

2) Wear a condom to reduce the sensitivity for you, without using numbing agents to numb her at the same time. I have also heard cock rings can help somewhat for some guys.

3) Learn to edge. While alone, or with your partner, practise taking yourself close to orgasm, stopping stimulation until the sensation dies down, and repeating this. It will help you find your point of no return, and help you feel more in control as you begin to be able to know when it is close and when to stop to avoid going over. Also referred to as the stop and start technique when done during sex.

4) Tone your pelvic floor muscles. It will help you gain more control when orgasm is close.

5) Squeeze under the head of your penis, or at the base of your penis, or gently pull on the balls: All of these are to be done when you are close to orgasm and feel you may be too close. Not all at the same time, but just find which one works best for you.

Then of course there is stuff like, not having sex in the position that gets you off the fastest. If you have a favourite position that pushes you close really fast, avoid that position until you are ready to orgasm. Try less stimulating positions, go slower during the sex, think about anything but sex (Something totally not sexual) to take the edge off the pleasure, etc etc.

13

I wouldn't say that my OH suffers from PE but due to my health issues we often go for longer than a month at a time without any sex and when we start again it takes him a while to regain control of his orgasms again. I guess he's just happy to be having sex again!

What he does to help is that he masturbates regularly to get some control of his body back on his own and we make sure to have sex regularly or at least do things like oral regularly. Its easy then for us to get back into 1-2 hour sessions.

Alternatively, we just make him cum right at the start and then he can go again later and last as long as he wants.

Hope this helps!

14

Drink less

Sex isnt just thrusting