Hi all i am looking some advice, lately i have been having a really mad fantasy involving another women and my OH. I dont want to go into full detail of the fantasy but basically it involves my OH having sex with another woman while i watch. I dont know how to tell my OH about my fantasy incase he is not interested in any of it as i want this to be something that could potentially happen.
How do i tell my OH about my fantasy?
Just as you have told this forum, it is a fantasy of yours, if you discuss it openly at the appropriate moment you will be able to gauge your partnerâs thoughts on the matter.
Perhaps start it with âI had this really strange dream last night, I imagined that you were having sex with another womanâ Or something along those lines. See where the conversation goes from there.
Iâd approach it in the same way as you would any other fantasy - respectfully and openly.
I canât talk on behalf of your partner, but I think that a significant amount of men would be very open to this fantasy.
I second this, I know my husband would too.
I still remember the day I told my future-husband that I was kinky. He said âewwâ, and now heâs got the bug even worse than what I have. Hopefully taking this brave step will be the start of a new adventure for you both 
I can understand your concern in discussing this with him but you need to discuss it with him. Of course the next issue will be who? Will it be someone you know, he knows or someone at a club / unknown source.
It will be something you really need to discuss in great detail as somethings are better left as fantasies. @Grainne
Maybe just say it to him that it was a fun dream you had and see how he interacts about it
I think my biggesr fear of telling him is that his biggest fantasy is to watch me with other men and he talks about it all the time and as much as it interests me i am having my own fantasies and i feel that he wouldnt be interested. We had a threesome with another woman before that used to be a friend and it turned out to be a complete disaster and i think it has put him off
do you two watch porn together? find a video that has exactly what your fantasy is and watch it with him, discuss it immediately afterwards. youâll get his honest opinion but youâll also need to be just as honest with your desires and what turns you on. please keep us posted on how this turns out for you.
Now is this a fantasy you want to really try to act out, or one that remains in your brain and you want you OH to feed. As previously mentioned watching it in some porn with your OH may help to establish which you truely want. Maybe some role play may help where you wear a wig/disguise and watch yourselves in a mirror may be exciting. Not only will you be seeing you OH with what looks like someone else but you will also be feeling what he is doing to her.
Thanks everyone for the advice it has been greatly appreciated, i finally managed to pluck up the courage and talk to my OH about my fantasy. It went alot better than i expected and was actually surprised to hear that he would be interested in it. I feel much more relaxed now that i have talked to him about it and relieved that he is interested in it.