Split from my OH :(

Off-Topic Chat
21

Thank you all so much for your comments & advice, its really helping me get my head straight.

I do feel slightly better about things today. Still weepy at times but work helped to take my mind off it a little.

GG - I definitely resisted the phonecall!!

I decided to give him until friday (he still hasn't given me a reason why) & then text him. Like Booties said, I just need closure. Even its not the answer I want, I just need to know why because the not knowing is what's hurting me the most.

I wish there was something I could do to thank everyone. You've all been more supportive than my own family.

*Big, squishy boobie hugs you all* External Media

Booties wrote:

We can't really do a whole lot to help you from here, but we're all here to comfort you and listen to you and give you whatever advise we can... And I stand by my offer to come up and mutilate him with a fold-up chair!

Take care, Sweetie.

-biggest hugs ever- External Media xx

External MediaExternal MediaExternal Media This!! With fecking bells on!!

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I'm not really good when it come's to supportive words and I myself have never really spoken to you much, but I know one thing and that is you are always so lively when using the forums and make the place seem more exciting for others. You started the LA arms which is a fab internet bar, this is just an example of how great and lovely you are.

I really hope things improve soon and you have the support here if and when you need it, just like you are supportive in your posts.

Sorry that probably seems really silly considering we haven't spoken much and I'm bad at giving advice.

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I'm so sorry G&G, sending lots of hugs for you

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glitter&gold wrote:

Thank you all so much for your comments & advice, its really helping me get my head straight.

I do feel slightly better about things today. Still weepy at times but work helped to take my mind off it a little.

GG - I definitely resisted the phonecall!!

I decided to give him until friday (he still hasn't given me a reason why) & then text him. Like Booties said, I just need closure. Even its not the answer I want, I just need to know why because the not knowing is what's hurting me the most.

I wish there was something I could do to thank everyone. You've all been more supportive than my own family.

*Big, squishy boobie hugs you all* External Media

I understand this, I was the same, but to be honest, it won't help you, my ex did the same, never really spoke to me about it, altho I knew our relationship had reached it's natural end, and like you, I thought I needed to see him to gain closure, but in actual fact, the more he avoided the conversation and me, the more it actually helped me, cos I saw him for the spineless twat that he was, and realised that in itself was closure enough.... I hope you can get to this point.

Well done on not making the call, he really doesn't sound like he deserves a moment more of your attention, time to focus on you and the future and not the past.

I know how hard it is though so don't beat yourself up if you feel like you're slipping, just recognise it as a slip and put it behind you.

From what you said about yuor self esteem, and again I was the same, why should this guy be allowed to continue to do this to you? There's a guy out there who won't do that and who will recognise you for the diamond you are

*booby hugs* xxx

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The Nymphomaniac wrote:

I'm not really good when it come's to supportive words and I myself have never really spoken to you much, but I know one thing and that is you are always so lively when using the forums and make the place seem more exciting for others. You started the LA arms which is a fab internet bar, this is just an example of how great and lovely you are.

I really hope things improve soon and you have the support here if and when you need it, just like you are supportive in your posts.

Sorry that probably seems really silly considering we haven't spoken much and I'm bad at giving advice.

Nympho, its not silly at all x External Media

I really appreciate the thought & it helps just to know people are here that I can whine to when things get bad, whether I speak to them loads or not xx

I sent a friend request so I can whine to you too!

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Thanks AA xx I need all the hugs I can get right now x

MissTerryCleavage wrote:

I understand this, I was the same, but to be honest, it won't help you, my ex did the same, never really spoke to me about it, altho I knew our relationship had reached it's natural end, and like you, I thought I needed to see him to gain closure, but in actual fact, the more he avoided the conversation and me, the more it actually helped me, cos I saw him for the spineless twat that he was, and realised that in itself was closure enough.... I hope you can get to this point.

Well done on not making the call, he really doesn't sound like he deserves a moment more of your attention, time to focus on you and the future and not the past.

I know how hard it is though so don't beat yourself up if you feel like you're slipping, just recognise it as a slip and put it behind you.

From what you said about yuor self esteem, and again I was the same, why should this guy be allowed to continue to do this to you? There's a guy out there who won't do that and who will recognise you for the diamond you are

*booby hugs* xxx

I get what you mean MTC, I really do. I'm torn now. I want the closure but I agree with what you said about his ignorance confirming him for the spinless twat he really is.

Ah feck it. I get paid on Thursday. If I can resist the text/call on friday I might treat myself to some new shoes & some Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie - they always cheer me up External Media

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Ben & jerry - 2 of my favourite men to curl up on the sofa with!

My circumstances were very diferent but when I became 'single' again one of the things I did was to clear out my underwear drawer and refill with pretty stuff, even though I was going to be the only one seeing it I got a boost knowing that I was wearing nice knickers. Hope that makes sense

Also splurged on lots of new shoes, something that husband would have frowned on.

Guess what I am really trying to say is go for it, retail therepy can make you feel better but dont overdo it.

xGGx

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ghostgirl wrote:

Ben & jerry - 2 of my favourite men to curl up on the sofa with!

My circumstances were very diferent but when I became 'single' again one of the things I did was to clear out my underwear drawer and refill with pretty stuff, even though I was going to be the only one seeing it I got a boost knowing that I was wearing nice knickers. Hope that makes sense

Also splurged on lots of new shoes, something that husband would have frowned on.

Guess what I am really trying to say is go for it, retail therepy can make you feel better but dont overdo it.

xGGx

This makes perfect sense!! I'm already on it! I've got some things on a "cheer me up wishlist" on my pc along these lines - Including a slinky whore red nightie that just screams "fuck you, you spineless wanker, look what you lost!!"

http://www.evans.co.uk/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?beginIndex=0&viewAllFlag=&catalogId=33054&storeId=12553&productId=2239099&langId=-1&sort_field=Relevance&categoryId=209592&parent_categoryId=209431&pageSize=20&refinements=category~[209595|209592]&noOfRefinements=1

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glitter&gold wrote:

ghostgirl wrote:

Ben & jerry - 2 of my favourite men to curl up on the sofa with!

My circumstances were very diferent but when I became 'single' again one of the things I did was to clear out my underwear drawer and refill with pretty stuff, even though I was going to be the only one seeing it I got a boost knowing that I was wearing nice knickers. Hope that makes sense

Also splurged on lots of new shoes, something that husband would have frowned on.

Guess what I am really trying to say is go for it, retail therepy can make you feel better but dont overdo it.

xGGx

This makes perfect sense!! I'm already on it! I've got some things on a "cheer me up wishlist" on my pc along these lines - Including a slinky whore red nightie that just screams "fuck you, you spineless wanker, look what you lost!!"

http://www.evans.co.uk/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?beginIndex=0&viewAllFlag=&catalogId=33054&storeId=12553&productId=2239099&langId=-1&sort_field=Relevance&categoryId=209592&parent_categoryId=209431&pageSize=20&refinements=category~[209595|209592]&noOfRefinements=1

That's nice, love the lace and tassle bit.

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glitter&gold wrote:

I get what you mean MTC, I really do. I'm torn now. I want the closure but I agree with what you said about his ignorance confirming him for the spinless twat he really is.

Ah feck it. I get paid on Thursday. If I can resist the text/call on friday I might treat myself to some new shoes & some Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie - they always cheer me up External Media

You deserve better G&G, but like I say I know how hard it is, I hope you don't think I'm being preachy, that's not my intention at all, just trying to share my experience. I guess him doing this and treating you badly will hopefully, quite soon, make you start to get angry not upset, and anger helps the moving on process, but again, don't show him your anger, vent it here cos sounds like he'd probably quite like to think you being angry, cos as a control freak he's just happy to know he has your attention in any form, don't give him the satisfaction....

Learn from this and use the experience to help you see what you won't ever 'settle' for again, no need to tread the same path twice ;-)

Retail therapy is good, the nightie is lovely, shoes are always good, and who can fault B&J for anything, haha! My retail therapy came in the form of this place, I indulged in toys and truly found out what I liked after years of shit sex, now I know and am not afraid to make sure I get it, haha!

You can do it :-) The future is bright..... trust me ;-)

Happy to chat if you ever need it xx

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MissTerryCleavage wrote:

You deserve better G&G, but like I say I know how hard it is, I hope you don't think I'm being preachy, that's not my intention at all, just trying to share my experience. I guess him doing this and treating you badly will hopefully, quite soon, make you start to get angry not upset, and anger helps the moving on process, but again, don't show him your anger, vent it here cos sounds like he'd probably quite like to think you being angry, cos as a control freak he's just happy to know he has your attention in any form, don't give him the satisfaction....

Learn from this and use the experience to help you see what you won't ever 'settle' for again, no need to tread the same path twice ;-)

Retail therapy is good, the nightie is lovely, shoes are always good, and who can fault B&J for anything, haha! My retail therapy came in the form of this place, I indulged in toys and truly found out what I liked after years of shit sex, now I know and am not afraid to make sure I get it, haha!

You can do it :-) The future is bright..... trust me ;-)

Happy to chat if you ever need it xx

External MediaExternal Media Thanks MTC you're a star xx

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Can't say much more than already's been said but best of luck and get that nightdress, it'll pep you up!

Just remeber, his loss will be some lucky blokes gain!

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Know I shouldn't be encouraging you to spend but I think this looks cute too

http://www.evans.co.uk/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?beginIndex=0&viewAllFlag=&catalogId=33054&storeId=12553&productId=2239099&langId=-1&sort_field=Relevance&categoryId=209592&parent_categoryId=209431&pageSize=20&refinements=category~[209595|209592]&noOfRefinements=1

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G&G you are better than this and you know it, he is obviously not good enough for you.... move on and dont look back, happiness is waiting around the corner for you

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sharry wrote:

Know I shouldn't be encouraging you to spend but I think this looks cute too

http://www.evans.co.uk/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?beginIndex=0&viewAllFlag=&catalogId=33054&storeId=12553&productId=2239099&langId=-1&sort_field=Relevance&categoryId=209592&parent_categoryId=209431&pageSize=20&refinements=category~[209595|209592]&noOfRefinements=1

I'm going MAD! I meant to post this

http://www.evans.co.uk/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?beginIndex=0&viewAllFlag=&catalogId=33054&storeId=12553&productId=2275796&langId=-1&sort_field=Relevance&categoryId=209431&parent_categoryId=&pageSize=200

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I knew I shouldn't have posted that bloody link - my nightie is out of stock

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glitter&gold wrote:

I knew I shouldn't have posted that bloody link - my nightie is out of stock External Media

Can you ring up your local Evans and see if they have it?

Ive just ordered this off Ebay, I know it's shorter but she might have something similar to the Evans one.

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=130502545605&var=430018591422&ssPageName=STRK:MEWAX:IT#ht_3538wt_778

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How about this, you can get it in red too.

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Long-lace-chemise-with-fishtail-Sizes-16-30-/130501616243?pt=UK_Women_s_Underwear_Design_2&var=&hash=item641f18a8ce#ht_3491wt_778

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sharry wrote:

glitter&gold wrote:

I knew I shouldn't have posted that bloody link - my nightie is out of stock External Media

Can you ring up your local Evans and see if they have it?

Ive just ordered this off Ebay, I know it's shorter but she might have something similar to the Evans one.

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=130502545605&var=430018591422&ssPageName=STRK:MEWAX:IT#ht_3538wt_778

Genius!!! External Media

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hi G&G im sorry to hear about your news i hope you mange to cheer yourself up soon and i'm sure you will start to feel better soon but it may take a while. sorry i'm not very good at this stuff i useually make someone a nice cup of tea at times like this so heres a cup of tea and some cake too!