tips for spicing up sex life

I have been married nearly 5 years, no kids yet that we can blame our dwindeling sex life on I am afraid!

I found out my husband was cheating on me 2 years ago, since then we have only had sex a handful of times. However recently its improved alot, however when you have slept with someone for 4.5 years and their body is so familar, its natural that we don't have the 'jump on eachother bones' feelings that we did when we first started dating.

I am looking for ideas to spice things up. I have tried the obvious dressing up etc, i am wondering if anyone ever does that role play where you pretend to be strangers in a bar then go to a hotel and have sex later on that night. I am open to other ideas to but this thought really appeals to me.

Thanks for reading and hope to hear some sexy tips!

Hi I hope things pick up for yous. Have youd ever used any toys during sex? Maybe opening up to role play or discussing and living out your fantasies will help re-create the spark. Toys on here are also a great way to spice things up, maybe have a look together and pick out things yous could try, or look at things apart and secretly order something and surprise each other, but talking about it is the first and probably most important step. Good luck.

You could always extend the bar role play:

Date 1: Role play as strangers and hook up in a bar, go back to hotel room

Date 2: The dinner date - go back to first date ground! Continue with the role play if it both worked for you, or have a dinner date as a married couple

Date 3: Cinema date

Date 4: Picnic

You get the idea!

I'd also suggest toys, maybe exploring any secret fetishes or fantasys either of you have.

Good luck!

Naughty Miss K x

Hi Naughty T.

Me and OH discuss every sexual fantasy we have.

Have you tried hand cuffing one of you while the other gets off to porn?

This is a great way to build temptation and tease the other.

You're not allowed to watch what the other is watching though!

Works for us :)

New to this site! How do I get evolved in topics? Sorry for ignorance :(

If I was you I would just plan a romantic night. Candle lot dinner, maybe a bubble Bath together. Buy some nice smelling massage oils on here and take turns to massage each other. Buy some new undies etc.
another day you should ask him to come in love honey to help you choice some underwear. While he's hear show him the toys to see how he reacts . My partner and i get horned up just looking at the toys on here a s reading the reviews together. Then introduce a few of them over the coming weeks and maybe a bit of light bondage.
Good luck x

I think @Naughtynurse85 has got it spot on. Go for a romantic evening in with the full works and use that to communicate and talk through fantasies, turn ons and possible role plays. I think the americans would call that a date night :-)

Ultimately the physical side should improve if you are doing things that both of you enjoy :-)

Good luck

Try visiting a swinger club? You need to talk it though first, obviously. Contact with others is not a requirement and it's very erotic just to be amongst other couples. Many people simply watch. You could take things slowly like we did, no contact with others until you are both ready and then soft-swinging until you are both fully ready for the next stage. It's good to push boundaries (slowly) but it's not for everyone.

Good luck and we hope you both find a way that suits you both.