Women not liking to receive oral?!

Sex Tips & Talk
1

Right, before some smart arse cherps up with "women like oral, you're just crap hahaha" - listen up: my OH loves me going down on her and God has personally high-fived me on my oral giving skills and refers to me as his second son.

That's not what this is about.

But I have noticed during my dating days, swinging days and Internet browsing days - that many women say they do not like receiving oral.

Now this is very weird to me because Dr. Orgasmo from the University of Science and Sex ensures me that the orgasm from the clit is the most powerful and intense of the 3 main different types of female orgasm.

In my personal experience I have found that giving said orgasm is very easy (no I am not a black belt in going down, I just had a very very good teacher - shame she also turned out to be evil but oh well).

I first came across this issue when I was 'dating' after splitting with my fiancée and made the mistake of sleeping with my housemate at the time. When we first slept together (yes it was multiple times - I like to repeat my mistakes to maximise the knowledge learnt from them) I went to go down on her and she politely informed me that there was no need as it did nothing for her.

Being a nice person I said I would anyway (aka my massive ego saw this as a challenge). Long story short: she had a massive orgasm (her first ever from oral) and we spent a nice couple of weeks fooling around in the bedroom until the standard conclusion of all 'sleeping with housemate' scenarios arisen.

And often during my swinging days I would have women specify on there profile that they do not like receiving oral.

And again here, women not liking it.

So, what's going on? Some people are missing out on potentially the best orgasm of their life for 'reasons'

Is it because past partners have been terrible?
Body image issues?

So my question is (yes you could have just skipped all that above, but hopefully you enjoyed it):

Why do some women not enjoy receiving oral?

2

I guess for all the reasons you mentions above. Some women have body issues and they can't relax properly because of them. Some guys are also very bad at giving oral sex and it can be "boring and I'm not getting anything from it" to "this is very painful". I guess it may also just not be some women's thing. not everybody enjoys every sexual acts, even if it's labeled as something they should absolutely like.

And what gives you the best orgasms also varies from person to person (or woman to woman), because personally, I love receiving oral sex, yet it's not what gives me the most powerful orgasms I've had.

Not everything's always black or white. There is no good answers in sex, as sex is different from person to person. I think you should stop thinking "THIS is the best orgasm a woman can have", "This, is the best sex act for a woman", "A woman can't guenuinely dislikeTHIS", "I know better than a woman how to make her orgasm", etc etc. Your mind is probably a bit wider than I am describing here, since you're asking that question, but I feel the answer you must keep in mind, is that everyone is different, and not everyone enjoys sex the same way or experience it the same way.

3

+1 Mamz, you said what I was thinking. Not everyone likes the same thing and everyones clitoris is not as sensitive which means different sensations. I think you should respect people not wanting oral instead of trying to convice them.

Personally, I love oral, but I never let guys go down on me the first times we have sex because it feels too intimare for just a casual partner and I'm not comfortable with exposing myself like that the first times we have sex, therefore it wouldn't be enjoyable anyway.

4

Personally there is a mental block, I can't get over the fear of not being well presented, anything less than immaculately clean would be horrifying for me. I have tried fresh from the shower but still don't feel clean enough, so I can't relax and enjoy it. My OH respects my wishes and has never attempted past the first time.

This said I have multiple orgasms penetratively with toys and my OH, and clitoral orgasms with toys and my OH hand, so really don't feel that I'm missing out.

Im glad your good at pleasuring a woman orally but I really wouldn't push the subject of a woman says no.

5

Ok, I'll start by saying that I would not continue to be intimate with someone who couldn't respect my likes, dislikes and boundaries. If I said I didn't like that particular act and my partner said "I'll do it anyway" then I would be getting up and leaving. I don't like it/I'm not interested doesn't mean convince me or let me prove that I know your body better than you.

I don't know why you are calling this an 'issue'. Some women just don't like it and it doesn't have to have anything to do with confidence or cleanliness, they simply just don't like it. Our bodies are all different and we all react to stimulation differently. Some women might have an extremely sensitive clitoris, which makes oral sex or direct contact painful. Others might have a more stubborn clitoris (like myself) so oral sex just isn't enough to make them orgasm. What works for one woman, doesn't work for the next.

6

Orgasms are definately not a 'one size fits all', and everyone is different. There are so many ways to reach an orgasm, through toys, sex, touching, mental stimulation etc. - If your partner does not like oral, then you should really respect that ...

7

Everyone has said it already. Women are different. Orgasms are different.

I see an awful lot of "Do women like?" or "Do men like?" threads here. Not to mention the "Is it normal?" threads. And there are nearly always a mutlitude of different answers because....*drum roll*..... we don't all enjoy the same things. It's a wonderful, crazy, complicated, exciting world of sex. Let everyone do (or not do) whatever they want. :)

8

Everyone is different. I'm not really into receiving oral sex myself. I like clit stimulation don't get me wrong, but I just want to be getting it from something more pinpoint than a tongue. As a result, I get stronger orgasms from fingers and toys.

And like everyone says, if your partner doesn't like receiving oral, you need to respect her wishes.

9

I think it all depends. Saying " it does nothing" or " i dont like it" is a easy answer. What girls really mean is " what about if it doesnt look/ smell/ taste right" "what if i orgasm to soon" girls think all kinds of thing.

As said above body issuses is a huge problem. I myself have only ever let my oh go down on me and that was after months of being together. Even now if ive not had a shower ect i hate him doing it. Then i tense from worrying to much. I just dont enjoy it.

10

Caliente wrote:

Everyone has said it already. Women are different. Orgasms are different.

I see an awful lot of "Do women like?" or "Do men like?" threads here. Not to mention the "Is it normal?" threads. And there are nearly always a mutlitude of different answers because....*drum roll*..... we don't all enjoy the same things. It's a wonderful, crazy, complicated, exciting world of sex. Let everyone do (or not do) whatever they want. :)

+5000

11

As mentioned everybody is different but I will add this; any intimate activity is a two way street that requires attention and communication. That shouldn't need to be said bit it always seems to be the case! I do make it clear when something feels good but if my partner is not listening or registering that then they won't act upon it or use that as a sign of possibly where to go next. It also means talking about things beforehand if there are any issues or concerns and that takes trust and consideration.

Personally I've not had any confidence issues with it however I have had partners who just didn't listen to my guidance about what I liked but also they were much more reserved partners, whereas my current partner is highly compatible with me as we seem very well matched when it comes to communicating, willingness to try new things and that we do just like to see what feels good by taking the time to explore. He seems to be much more interested in making it a shared experience and gets off on making me feel good, just as I love making him feel the same way when the attention is on him. I'm very lucky to have such a man in my life but anybody could be like that if they just took the time and attention to talk, listen and get hands on.