A couple of posts got me thinking about this. When we were at uni, after drunken nights out, me and my best girl friend would often end up in bed together having a play with each other. It was nothing serious but happened a good few times as we lived together with others at the time.
We are both now happily married for years but talked about it a few times since and probably both at a stage where we would like to get together for a night of girly fun in bed. Obviously I would not cheat on my husband but it is something I would like to do with his blessing, if that were possible. Do any married people have female partners also? Any husbands that don’t mind this?
Hi @luscious_laura, if you’ve ever read my blog, you’ll know I do this a fair bit. Having suppressed my liking of ladies for a good while with former boyfriends, my husband thought I should explore that side again, and so I’ve slept with a number of people (with his blessing - and also the other way round I should say - it isn’t all one way). Works for us. Can see it not working well for everyone.
I’m still trying to work up the courage to tackle this very same subject with my partner.
There are some things he won’t do and I feel I’m missing out on, this might be the answer to fill in those gaps, so to speak.
Well @luscious_laura I would say go for it, after talking with hubby. Ask him to watch, I’m sure he would be up for that lol. Sorry my sense of humour.
Agree with @FortySomethingWife as this could definitely go a couple of different ways and not necessarily good @luscious_laura . A lot will depend on not just this conversation with your husband but where you are both at.
When I first started dating my wife she told me that she had also had relationships with women. So 20+ years on, when in our 40’s and talking openly and honestly about ourselves and what makes us happy she said she loved me very much but really wanted to have sex with woman again. She said she had become friends with another mum in the area, clicked and become quite flirty. She wanted to act on it but only if I was ok. I wasn’t surprised as I always new she was bi and was taken a back by her honestly and bravery in tackling the subject. While we were in a great place in our marriage and sexually I was nervous about where this could lead and what it would mean for us and the family. I told her I was on board as long as there was transparency as to where it was going. A bit of a leap of faith but I have always trusted my wife.
5 years on and her friend and her hook up for sex a few times a year, normally as a girls weekend away. Both I and the other husband are on board and while I can’t speak for him our marriage became stronger and our sex life is stronger now than in our 30’s. We had a journey through our 40’s about making our lives happier and that was all about talking with one another. My wife is bisexual,honest and happy. We have been lucky in the fact that both couples have been after pretty much the same thing which made it less complicated . No swinging in case you were wondering.
I’m too selfish to share my hubby, he’s all mine to play with and vice versa. For me personally, I just couldn’t do it. Have sex with someone else, and go back home to him, or knowing someone else is with my hubby and having sex with him. I just couldn’t do it to him.
But each to their own, it works for some couples. Definitely have that talk with him if it’s something you want to pursue. It might work for you.
Oh no I’m really truly ok with it , I’m glad I now know what we do / don’t want. I’m also glad it’s given me the push to improve myself and to make a few changes …
Trust me if you’d have seen my LH order this morning your jaw would have hit the floor, to be fair mine hit the floor when I opened it! Lol
No, I really think people need to experiment and to try new things but with sooo much communication and definitely plans as to exactly what’s allowed and what isn’t. For some it works, for others it just doesn’t. People may find they like/ actually don’t like things and that’s a good thing to know. I now know for sure I’m 100% straight for example, I also know what I enjoy and don’t enjoy.
That’s my point though, there needs to be consideration as this particular setup may open things further than they are comfortable with and so ground rules need to be set First. Serious chats, serious ground rules and the understanding it could be a one off if it’s not how they imagined.
That’s my point for this post though (I don’t want posts to be about me) to TALK TALK TALK and to set the rules. Good luck and I hope you have a bunch of fun x
Totally agree. Maybe went into too much detail on our story but that was the point I was making. If we had have gone through this 10 years earlier it would have been a disaster. The last 10 years talk between us has been the key. I also think that we have been very lucky with my wife’s girlfriend, both wanting exactly the same thing.
I would like to see my wife with another woman / watch and not have to hear about it post hoc.
Not with another man though as I’m a bit too jealous but if she wanted to explore a bit with a small potential part of her lesbian or bi side I wouldn’t mind once in a very blue moon.
In the early days when we were in our early 20’s and living in a rented flat together, we went out one evening with a few friends
One of my now wife’s friends lived an hour away , so she was staying over
Well we all had a bit to much to drink and all very merry
At the end of the night we all went our different ways obviously apart from the friend that was staying over
All I remember was we all were laughing and fooling around n a drunken state, think I was the most sober and basically all got ready went for bed
I do remember her friend coming to say goodnight totally naked and doing that girlie night hug and kiss thing and getting in our bed
While she got in bed joking about having a threesome, which no one disagreed with having.
I didn’t do to bad out of it as I recall as my gf was being kissed and fondled by her friend
So I joined in, it was all hands and kissing
Although her friend knew not to got to far as I remember my gf wanting me to fuck her while she fingered her friend to orgasm and as a guy watching this was an experience
In the morning we never said a word about the night before or since then
@H_B1 This would be the perfect outcome, I don’t want it to go any further but just to hook up a couple of times a year would be enough overnight or girls weekend away. I am hoping my husband would be OK with this and would potentially be exciting for him.
and vice versa. For me personally, I just couldn’t do it. Have sex with someone else, and go back home to him, or knowing someone else is with my hubby and having sex with him. I just couldn’t do it to him.