Well, There is a possibility Lady-J and myself MIGHT be trying out some of our BDSM gear tonight as little man is off to his other grandparents for the w/end.
Will we, Or won't we? I hope we do as last night J tried on the collar and liked it.
She seemed interested, Sooooo. Watch this space......
I may incorperate a toy into the fold aswell so we could have a few reviews all there in one swoop :)
Until then, Any ideas/suggestions for a passionate yet kink filled night would be greatly appreciated. ;)
Woohoo Sed, sounds like a great night to me. I'm sure you already have a safe word!
I would start of with nothing to scary, maybe some soft restraints and a blindfold. I love it when my OH uses some ice cubes or massage melts and a feather tickler. Teasing me all over. He actually got a lot from this the first time as it showed him exaclty where I liked to be touched, infact he found some places I liked to be touched that I didn't know about!
I would just take it at a pace that you both feel comfortable with and go with the flow!
Keeping it simple works too! You dont want to throw everything in all at once, itd be a little intimidating - especially first time!
SLM seems to have given really good advice - teasing would be a fun way to start, and with a blindfold, all your senses are heightened and its very very fun.
Make sure you arent too indecisive or show any moments where you have any second thoughts. Second guessing yourself is just not so good. Its why a) Phantasma is so good at it, and b)Id be so bad at it! The experience just wouldnt be the same.
I'm planning on using the Shibari Love Rope wrist and ankle cuffs, An oriental feather tickler, A blind fold and something sexy/slutty but simple for her to wear for me.
Maybe something small & crotchless or her pvc mini dress. hmmm.
And I know she wants to wear her new collar for me.
The strangest thing will actually be me taking on a DOM role. Usually in everyday life, J is the Dominant partner. So it's a bit new for me, However J loves me taking control, So bbeing in the sub role should be ok for her ! :)
what you have planned sounds great, if she isn't used to been tied up I wouldn't do it to tight, the collor sounds lovely I love wearing mine, but don't tend to that often.
I would maybe ask her before you start if there is anything she really wouldn't want you to do, I always try to tell Mr B if there is something that I don't want to do beforehand, that way he doesn't do anything that would upset me and then spoil the mood.
I think alot of it will depend on how relaxed and willing J is to really go along with what you want and how far you want to take it. If it doesn't go exactly to plan don't worry about it, I have a habit of laughing when he is whipping me which really spoils the mood and makes him laugh to.
Hey...well what the girls have said seems pretty good advice. From the guy's ( and dom's ) perspective, relax. Like Inara said, be confident about what you're doing, it's much sexier that way. And like Boobaloo said, it's a good idea to make it clear what she wants and is uncomfortable with before you start so you can be more confident in yourself about things. Don't worry about getting it right first time either, it takes a long time to get the right mindset IMO. And never pass on an opportunity to tease lols...drive her wild with anticipation.
If you're gonna be spanking or using a whip, best make sure she's quite turned on first. Apparently it's much nicer when she's closer to cumming. Much nicer. Um....that's about all I've got to add I think. Otherwise, just enjoy it!
where you have any second thoughts. Second guessing yourself is just not so good. Its why a) Phantasma is so good at it, and b)Id be so bad at it! The experience just wouldnt be the same.
As both Inara and Mr Boob said confidence will be key for your role. I've often foundn that being silent works fairly well - that way if you are unsure of anything or trying to decide what to do next then (presuming youve blindfolded her) shes left in suspense and cant tell!
I wouldnt go too far with the toys and so forth - dont know how experienced you both are but Id say start with the collar and the dress prehaps. Add the blindfold later for more teasing.
With cuffs and so forth I tend to order her not to move her hands/feet - which is both in character and very hard for Inara! External Media That way when the handcuffs actually come out theres much more of a punishment feeling there... and its more frustrating for the sub if shes been tied down and teased for ages but cant act on it!
As people have said before teasing is certainly a good way to go - how you do that is something only you can judge - but make sure she has to beg for her orgasm!
On safety grounds - safe-word and avoiding anything you know she doesnt like is a good way to go, at least the first time. If you want to try and ease her into something in subsequent sessions then go for it - but probably better not the first time.
Hope you see this before the big night - and remember Confidence is sexy!
As people have said before teasing is certainly a good way to go - how you do that is something only you can judge - but make sure she has to beg for her orgasm!
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This is one thing that drives me mad, Mr B does this to me all the time, I love it, he normally tells me I am not allowed to have one until he says I can, and that if I do then I will be punished, that itself is normally enough to send me straight over the edge, leading to spanking or whipping and then having to beg for it, stopping begging meaning he stops playing. He doesn't always blindfold me, instead saying that he likes me to be able to see what he is doing, what toys he is getting out etc etc to build up the anticipation.
Didn't happen the way I/We planned, But we did have an awesome night.
I'll go into minor details and skim over the porn lol....
Didn't use restraints/collar in the end, And Jade didn't get dressed up for me, However....
I DID get dressed up in a smart black shirt, Undone at the collar, Dark jeans and smart shoes. Donned my soft pvc black thong and black rings/ea rings ec. Kinda like a Ever-so-slighly-goth-dom-stylee lol. J loved it!
I did sneak one of our floggers in for a try out, And J actually loved it! Used it to lighly flog and to tease certain 'areas'
We also got to use a few toys for the first time, Which was hit'n'miss really.
The Doc Johnson Tickle & Tease Me Vibe which J really liked, And the Doc Johnson Girls Squirmy Silver Streak Rabit by Jenna Jameson/Sophia Rossi. The Rabbit was hit'n'miss because She just couldnt relax - Probably because the parents were downstairs, But she did really enjoy the bunny ears!
Yay!!! I even recieved my first 'Handjob' last night which was amazing! J certainly knows what to do with her hands!
I actually took a day off work today so we can both have some proper quality time, With NO interuptions so we can get all relaxed and try it again.
The things I do! lol.
Anyway, We had probably the best 4 hours ever last night and there's definately more to come!
