I’ve just tagged you in a post that I wrote last year about my experience of going through the menopause.
Basically it robbed me of ‘me’ for years before I realised what was happening to me. Unexplained horrific anxiety, zero confidence, no sex drive, rage from nowhere, insomnia and more. In hindsight I think I should have been on HRT years ago, but didn’t know. Now I am and this includes testosterone which was the missing piece of the jigsaw for me personally.
I feel more like ‘me’ than I have for years, life is so much better. Been with my OH for 38 years and we are now making up for lost time.
I would suggest both you AND your wife research the menopause together, the impact it has on literally every aspect of her life / body / brain and if HRT is an option for her. Good luck
Careful with that one @Ajp . Fully understand what you are saying but a true relationship is far more. I am dealing with the same and know exactly what you mean but still love my wife for who she is.
I have to say that the cuddling, kissing, and even a little bit of flirting has been occurring. Looking back out my posts of a couple of weeks ago I realize that I was more down on the situation than the what the actual situation was. Since then we have had some good sex, on failure that turned into an argument. But overall things have been good both in the bedroom and in life in general. We both realize that some of it is just outside stress that has impacted out bedroom life some.
@Ajp of course I don’t know your situation or what is right for you, but I found what has worked for me is for me to stop obsessing about it. Don’t try to make every cuddle or kiss turn into sex. Actually enjoy the little cuddle or touch here and there. And talk about anything. Good luck, and hopefully things work out for you.
Are there any books you have read on the menopause you’d recommend ?
im coming from the angle of a guy whose wife is 44, we have noticed some perimenopausal changes, she is on top of it and has GP dialogue however id like to learn more to be well informed so i can support her in any way she needs.
There’s a book called Menopause: All you need to know in one concise manual (Concise Manual) Hardcover - looks the Hayes car manual books. It’s a very easy book to read, but explains the changes caused by the menopause and how HRT can help. I wish I’d read it years ago.
I would also recommend the Davina programs, there are 2 of them about an hour each. Watched them with my OH and I burst into tears as I realised why I was feeling like I was. OH felt the programs were also helpful for him to understand what was going on.
There’s a FB group called Menopause Support Network which is a fab source of info. Your wife can book a private consultation via their website (£75) which helped me get testosterone. Using the balance app helped me log and recognise symptoms that I had no idea were menopausal.
From what I’ve read its better to start early with HRT as it can mean your hormone levels are kept balanced which can reduce symptoms down the line.
