Yes my wife will not talk about it,everytime i try and raise the subject she just storms off and does not speak to me for the rest of the day,dont know what to do,i just blame myself and keep trying to think what i have done wrong.
Thank you, I just want my wife feeling like herself again, because she feels lost at the moment
but I keep telling her I’m not going anywhere I just want her back to herself & the only people that can help are the doctors![]()
My thought’s exactly.
Not just that,its the intimacy that goes with it cuddling ,kissing and been affectionate
Feel your frustration, myself and my OH are going through it too, started a Thread about our experience too, for me my biggest worry was I don’t want to come over sounding selfish at such a difficult time for my OH, I know she can’t help what going through the menopause is doing to her physically and emotionally but you just can’t not think about the good time because for us, my sex drive hasn’t changed and the need is still there! Its so difficult to get things right and not sound selfish.
Also appear to be in same boat at moment with wife. Hoping to read of positive stories from other couples who’ve come through the other side intact.
Wife’s sex drive has completely fallen off a cliff this last couple of months and her lack of affection and bad temper is starting to take its toll on me.
Hopefully things get better. I’m trying to be as patient and supportive as possible but feels like our relationship is suffering.
Yes, it’s not a huge amount of time but I prefer to address issues sooner rather than later. Thanks for suggestions, have been doing all of those, especially maintaining affection. At moment don’t know conclusively if it is menopause but she’s nearly 51 and there are other changes which point that way.
Interested to read about other couples who’ve managed to negotiate this phase successfully both in terms of sexual relationship but also overall wellbeing and maintaining close bond.
That’s my wife 100%.Moods are really bad.
Still love her
What age range does it generally appear?
Wife is 53. Been 4 years
In the same boat but over a decade since I last got laid. My wife acknowledges that menopause is the issue but not yet motivated to start hormone therapy. It needs to be her choice, not my suggestion. That being said, I have become rather creative in my self play over the years. Regardless, she is 10 years older than me but we have had a long term relationship and truly are partners. Our life cycles just don’t match up. Sex is great and I am all in but it doesn’t make the relationship.
Like everything to do with the menopause, its hot and cold, her temperature mostly, her mood, sleeping and sex is no different, we can go weeks without a sniff of sex then like this weekend it’s been sex Friday night, last night and already making noices about tonight!!
Unfortunately the menopause is something that even women don’t fully understand so as men we have no hope, for me all I can do is support her through it and remember through no fault of her own one day she’ll be beelzebub and then next she’ll be Adriana Chechik!!
Totally respect the viewpoint. Good on you.
If the motivation / arousal isn’t there would it not be like a gym membership you hate going to? My wife tells me all the time I am supposed to eat more vegetables. I know that, but I don’t. It needs to be one’s personal decision to make any changers IMO.
If I am reading your post correctly, are you telling me that if my wife uses a vibrator more often she will overcome menopause?
Thanks for sharing. Still piecing all the issues together for the right solution for us.
I’ll throw my hate into the ring on this subject and I think some of our issues are also menopausal related. But I’m not positive as she also has some issues with work load and work stress. The low level of sex, about every other week, is one thing, but the lack of nonsexual physical contact, cuddling, flirting, etc is also hard to deal with. It is there however most of the time it takes me initiating it. A couple of months ago she was very affectionate and it was a time that work was not stressful. And I will say that she has been doing more of that lately so perhaps there is some hope. I at least need that.
Twenty years ago I knew our sex life would slow, but I didn’t expect it to slow to a drip or two. Now I’m concerned that it could dry up completely.
What age ranges @Pogo69 ?
I’ve just tagged you in a post that I wrote last year about my experience of going through the menopause.
Basically it robbed me of ‘me’ for years before I realised what was happening to me. Unexplained horrific anxiety, zero confidence, no sex drive, rage from nowhere, insomnia and more. In hindsight I think I should have been on HRT years ago, but didn’t know. Now I am and this includes testosterone which was the missing piece of the jigsaw for me personally.
I feel more like ‘me’ than I have for years, life is so much better. Been with my OH for 38 years and we are now making up for lost time.
I would suggest both you AND your wife research the menopause together, the impact it has on literally every aspect of her life / body / brain and if HRT is an option for her. Good luck
Thank you very much,my wife has very simlar symptoms, so trying to get her to see the doctor, hope we have the same outcome as you.![]()
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