I've always had this issue with my current partner (7 months) where I will always have a sore, irritated vaginal opening after sex. It means I can never have sex 2 days in a row and certainly not twice in one day.
It wasn't too much of an issue, but now it seems to have gotten worse, where I can only really have sex for about 5 minutes until my vagina is too painful and I have to stop.
We use a lot of lubricant and have tried different brands so it is unlikely to be this. I also do not have an STI.
Has anyone experienced this? And any idea how I can fix it?
Sorry I can't give you more useful advice, but have you spoken with your doctor about it? It sounds like an allergy, maybe to condoms or his soap? Are you well aroused when penetration occurs?
I have been to the doctor, she suggested to try thrush cream for a few days and go back for a check up if it doesn't work (unlikely to work but I'll give it a go).
We don't use condoms but we tried it and it made no difference. And yes, I am.
I'm just unsure if this is just a natural thing that women experience and that I may not be able to change.
Hmm tough I'd suggest the thrush cream first. I'd also recommend using a condom see if it makes any difference. Really doesn't sound pleasant hope you find an answer hun X
I have had this issue as well. No infections or allergies, plenty of lube, plenty of foreplay etc. I still have no idea why it happens but my vaginal opening is very tight so that may have something to do with it, do you think it could be the same for you?
If we've been at it for more than 15 mins or so then I do feel sore afterwards, and if we have sex the next day the soreness is worse after that. However, if we continue to have regular sex then it's not so bad as I seem to get used to it, so I find that if it's been a long time since we've done it it's always much worse.
I don't have much advice I'm afraid, just experiment with positions and take it at your own pace. Sometimes we're able to do it rough and fast, but if I'm feeling sensitive or sore then we take it slow and we can go for much longer. Certain positions (like doggy style, although it is my favourite!) can hurt more too.
Might be the type of lubricant? I know you said that you've tried different ones but what brands and type do you use?
I've used waterbased in one brand and switched to another thinking I was fine and had a nasty allergic reaction so they could all just contain something your body is sensitive to.
Have you tried sitting in a warm bath as soon as possible after sex, preferably with a little salt added ? This may help to soothe any soreness but if it's an on going problem, as it seems to be then I'd definitely try what the doctor recommended. But do make sure you go back to the doctor until its resolved. It's not 'normal' and it isnt something you should have to put up with xx
Have you experienced this with previous partners or is it a new issue?
I only ask because other members are saying it's not normal, which it may well not be, but it's normal for me because of my anatomy and I've been given the all clear from GPs and gynaecologists. Having said that it does sound more severe for you, and if it's bothering you a lot then you shouldn't feel you need to put up with it.
About the lube - only used water based, Lovehoney brand, Durex, Superdrug brand and Sliquid h2o (as natural as it gets so definitely not having a reaction to lube). Not tried silicone lube.
I didn't have this problem with my past partner, but we didn't have sex as often (longer distance so once a week). We used condoms, but did try using a condom recently with my current partner to check and it made no difference.
The position doesn't seem to matter, it seems to just be down to time, after a certain amount of time it will just begin to hurt and get to the point I just have to stop.
It didn't bother us when it was just after sex, as sometimes it would fade quite quickly or just meant we couldn't do it the next day (not usually a problem as we don't live together). But now it's halting sex half way through because I can't carry on so I'd really like to fix it!
I will try the doctors advice and go back if there's no improvements (pretty sure from experience that it's not thrush related). Thanks and good to hear it's not necessarily unusual to get soreness after sex.
I know you stated you do not have an STI, but it could also be a non-STI releated issue such as BV or baceterial vaginosis. Oftentimes it is hard to detect and you may have no other symptoms and may want to look into this.
Also, are you on the pill or other hormonal birth control? I found when I was on one type of birth control pill I could barly self lubricate and sex was painful. You may want to consider how that may affect you as well.
Definately talk to a doctor about this. Good luck hon!
I sometimes feel sore after sex and it feels tender and a little swollen. However my partner is well endowed and it's usually after a rough session, not all the time.
Does it feel any better if you warm yourself up beforehand like lots of foreplay or using a small sex toy rather than going straight into it? I would use the treatment for thrush because that can really make you sore after sex.
Are you enjoying sex? Could it be that you're not in the mood or could being anxious about the pain cause you to tense up?
Either way get straight back to the doctors. Also, have a litte look down below after you've had sex with a mirror. Check for red areas, bleeding, rash, discharge etc. Hopefully you'll get to the bottom of this problem soon x
This is interesting. I had the exact same symptoms and went through 6 months of hell with reoccuring thrush. DO use the cream, and do make your partner use it, as there is a chance if it is thrush, you could be passing it back and forth between you both. Its only after a change in diet, loads of pills from the doctors that it has gone away hopefully for good.
I've noticed that on my current pill, Cerazette, it is impossible to self lubricate, and I am drier than I have ever been since being on this pill, and can make sex at times quite uncomfortable.
In my previous relationship, I had an STI that was very difficult to detect apperently in the words of the doctors. Are you 100% sure you are both clean? He shown no symptoms, and wasn't until sex was extremeley painful that I decided to get it checked out, and turned out to be TV, very rare apperently. It really is worth double checking, even if you're sure, just to rule it out.
I am definitely into it, and the amount of foreplay doesn't seem to change anything.
Interesting that you say the pill may affect it. I have been on the pill for over 3 years and haven't recently changed brand or type. But till could be a possibility I suppose. I definitely have issues with natural lubrication, but I've been on the pill ever since I started to have sex so I've never known any different, which is why I use a lot of lube.
I have been tested since starting this relationship and came up clear, but if it's an infection I'm sure that will come up when I see a doctor. I have been screened recently though, and this has been going on longer, so I would have thought it would have been noticed then if there was anything to see. I can see no clear visual problems myself.
Lots of really good advice here but just a quick addition.
I had pain with my partner exactly like this and all they told me to do was use thrush cream. It didn't work at all for like 5 months. Then I saw one doctor who suggested that every time we had sex I was basically reinfecting myself because he was carrying it. Make sure he goes to get tested for skin issues as well. We both used the creams (I had the thrush pill as well just to make sure) and it all balanced out.
as well as the good advice above, have a think about how you wash yourself - are you washing too harshly and maybe too often? I'd recommend no long baths with bubble bath, have showers instead and use a ph nuetral wash such as vagasil. canesten (makers of the thrush cream) also sell a ph neutral wash that is supposed to be extra-soothing. my daughter recommends it.
also, get your boyfriend to use a ph neutral wash as well. good luck!