I thought it might be good to have a truth thread. Where there is something you want / need to get off your chest but you don't 'want advice' or 'want sympathy'.
You just need to share it with someone.
I'll start...I don't love him, and I don't fancy him
This saves me from starting a new thread . Ewww that awkward moment !
I'll set the seen . Just driven back from Blackpool approx 65 miles after me and my Mrs cleaned her house as she is rather poorly at the moment and did some errands. So basically we were both shattered and just ordered our evening meal in our town local at around 8.30 .
And who walked in .Only my ex fiance ,her sister and mother. I havnt seen her since we split up and not very amicably over 26 years ago. I couldn't believe it was her as she has aged not very well to say the least.Even my Mrs placed her in her late 50s when in fact she is 3 years younger than me at around 50 .In did squirm a little and felt very uneasy but thankfully neither her or her party recognised me .So we just finished our meal and slipped quietly to another pub. I know now those people feel on Ex On The Beech .It isn't very pleasant .Today is a day I want to forget!
delilahxx wrote:
I thought it might be good to have a truth thread. Where there is something you want / need to get off your chest but you don't 'want advice' or 'want sympathy'.
You just need to share it with someone.
I'll start...I don't love him, and I don't fancy him
That sounds like a pretty strong statement. Something happened, perhaps gone wrong ? Thats how I felt about my ex fiance as mentioned above when I felt our relationship was going nowhere and I was feeling trapped .Sometimes you owe it to yourself to be honest and I had to end it. It didnt end very well for me/us as I didnt know how to end it without upset at The time.
Glad I ended it though but wish I handled it better .
I need to shake my life up.
New job
Bit more me time
Get back into my hobbies
I'm getting obsessed with sites like this one.
Work is draining me, badly managed, stuck in the past, understaffed and frustrating. It's taking its toll on me.
Now the kids are a school I will turn this around.
Great idea for a thread.
luvved up cupple wrote:
I need to shake my life up.
New job
Bit more me time
Get back into my hobbies
I'm getting obsessed with sites like this one.Work is draining me, badly managed, stuck in the past, understaffed and frustrating. It's taking its toll on me.
Now the kids are a school I will turn this around.
Great idea for a thread.
You need to get back into your hobbies as that will give you your me time. In my own relationship ,I still need that space sometimes and have a man cave for which I use as a bolt hole when needed.
I find humans exhausting most of the time, people are becoming far more demanding and act like the world owes them something. Not saying this is true of everyone, just the people I come across.
And humans are destroying this planet - the animals were here first so stop destroying their habitats.
I want to quit my job, it gives me stress eczema. But I'm the sole breadwinner and immigration demands I earn over 18k a year or else my partner won't be able to stay in the country. This stresses me out loads.
I secretly want to be a writer. I think that's why I started blogging, to have some kind of anonymous outlet.
I know I seen your full post mysteron can see how awkward it would have felt. At least they didnt realise it was you.
luvved up cupple wrote:
I need to shake my life up.
New job
Bit morback into my hobbies
I'm getting obsessed with sites like this one.Work is draining me, badly managed, stuck in the past, understaffed and frustrating. It's taking its toll on me.
Now the kids are a school I will turn this around.
Great idea for a thread.
You sound similar to me atm.
Feel bogged down by everything, but our youngest has now started school, so now is Me time.
I'm the black sheep in a very small family. I'm safely out of the way, they will never visit me. I only visit them when absolutely necessary (3-4 times a year, for a couple of hours at a time). They are very draining, and I always feel exhausted, and uncomfortable when I get home. I told OH yesterday when I got back I feel like I have just shaken off a whole load of parasites.
I think the way im going to aproach future visits is, what can I do/buy my sisters child that the child will love but my sister will hate! Her husband is much more open minded and sees me in good light, but he is bullied by my sister and mother too.
My parting comment to my mother was I might see you before Christmas, or it might be new year. So I can push things a while and maybe go next year. I'm very greatful for the distance between us.
My sister had a real go at me for not accepting her as a friend on face book. My reply was cutting but truthful "I can choose my friends not me family". I think she got the hint. I sound like a real bitch when I talk about my family, but it's self preservation. I'm so glad to be home and away from them.
Ok here goes!!
I love my husband but fancy someone else!
It wont go anywhere, but has highlighted to me that I need to still work through some issues with the hubby so things dont slide even more!
It came out of the blue, Its shaken me up, especially with so many other things going on
Is totally fed up of vanilla and wants to explore but OH has lost sex drive and does not even offer affection. Wits end!
Siren40 wrote:
Ok here goes!!
I love my husband but fancy someone else!
It wont go anywhere, but has highlighted to me that I need to still work through some issues with the hubby so things dont slide even more!
It came out of the blue, Its shaken me up, especially with so many other things going on
Siren40 speaking with others I think this is very common. You seem a really nice person please try to speak with husband first as you may be able to resolve issues. He may be trying his best ( this has happened to me ) and may love you to bits. Please remember me are different and we have too many faults. I think one problem with us men is we don't talk about stuff as women seem to. My wife often says that she ' spoken to her friends ' men just don't do this. Good luck !
Tony71 wrote:
Siren40 wrote:
Ok here goes!!
I love my husband but fancy someone else!
It wont go anywhere, but has highlighted to me that I need to still work through some issues with the hubby so things dont slide even more!
It came out of the blue, Its shaken me up, especially with so many other things going on
Siren40 speaking with others I think this is very common. You seem a really nice person please try to speak with husband first as you may be able to resolve issues. He may be trying his best ( this has happened to me ) and may love you to bits. Please remember me are different and we have too many faults. I think one problem with us men is we don't talk about stuff as women seem to. My wife often says that she ' spoken to her friends ' men just don't do this. Good luck !
Thank you Tony71
I know my husband loves me, he is my best friend. I also know he is trying hard... juggling family and work is hard and we have 3 gorgeous children and not much outside help.
I really dont want to hurt him, so will do my best to work through it.
The eye candy will stay as just that, because no good could come of it! But I now see how affairs ect happen when you take your eye of the ball in your relationship.
JVWH wrote:
Is totally fed up of vanilla and wants to explore but OH has lost sex drive and does not even offer affection. Wits end!
You could try some solo adventures? Blindfolded, fun with toys, or temperature play. If he got to watch he might really like it.
Fun Louise wrote:
I'm the black sheep in a very small family. I'm safely out of the way, they will never visit me. I only visit them when absolutely necessary (3-4 times a year, for a couple of hours at a time). They are very draining, and I always feel exhausted, and uncomfortable when I get home. I told OH yesterday when I got back I feel like I have just shaken off a whole load of parasites.
I think the way im going to aproach future visits is, what can I do/buy my sisters child that the child will love but my sister will hate! Her husband is much more open minded and sees me in good light, but he is bullied by my sister and mother too.
My parting comment to my mother was I might see you before Christmas, or it might be new year. So I can push things a while and maybe go next year. I'm very greatful for the distance between us.
My sister had a real go at me for not accepting her as a friend on face book. My reply was cutting but truthful "I can choose my friends not me family". I think she got the hint. I sound like a real bitch when I talk about my family, but it's self preservation. I'm so glad to be home and away from them.
You love the children, otherwise I'd ditch them full stop hugs I did 10 years ago next February best thing I ever did.
I really feel weird in my family... My sister finished uni like 6 months ago, has no job, had very expensive wedding, new phone, laptop, camera, and like 4 tattoos on both arms. But when I say I dont agree with it, its brought up that I studied in UK and that I costed my parents more. I admit it may be the truth, but after uni I was earning my own money about 2 weeks after getting out, even if it was shitty pay, long hours. But I did it. Even if it meant I had no money for meat, I just did it.
Now when I visit my parents, my sister even has stupid comments that maybe I can do something, because I am soo rarely at home, while she does it all the time. I am not the one living off my parents! I earn my own way in life and if I come to stay over once a month, why I should serve my sister, who does not work, everytime I see her, she is at her PC, on FB and playing games?
And before her wedding I was told to be absolutely quiet, when its normal I go to sleep, she has lights on, playing games till 3 am... But if I bring it up, I am the bad one. She sleeps badly, even if she goes to bed 8pm, when I cannot do anything in the room, she gets up at 10am...
And its normal that if she has to get up early, she wokes me up...and I am not even able to raise my voice, because she is sooo sensitive. On her wedding day she woke me up at 5, because she had nothing prepared and was slamming every single wardrobe door. Not to mention, she snoozed the alarm 3 times.
But hey who cares. She goes to bed sometimes 8pm, gets up 10am, and then hit the bed for all afternoon after lunch.
I just feel weird, that I dont like this. And it has nothing to do with just money... Oooh well. I guess I get ready to supporting her from my tax money. Because she is planning her family next year, and not sure how she will do it without job, and any savings... I guess parents, lets pay for it.
Sometimes I wish she was dead, for her sake as well as mine.
My life sucks at the moment!
I went on holiday with my fella and our children and he ended it when we came back. I basically have scared him off as I'm mid thirties and know what I want, he makes me happier than I have been, we get on so well and it's the best sex of my life! I want to get married (not right away or anything but eventually) but he's concluded that after his last marriage he doesn't think he can ever get married and so he ended it. Our children haven't seen each other since other than once on FaceTime.
We still text a lot and are still sleeping together, if you were to read our messages you would think that we are still together. We were meant to go out for drinks yesterday but he had to cancel as he was really ill. It's not the typical FWB relationship, it's like what we had before just not with the same intensity or our children being involved. (we don't have kids together but they all get on really well too) I miss him so much and when my kids are with their Dad I'm so lonely.
I have recently been suffering with depression and anxiety and since we split the Dr has doubled my dose. I just feel so low.
My work has dried up too and next month I can't really afford to live next month and my ex husband doesn't pay any maintenance and hasn't helped with the mortgage since he left.
I feel like im falling in love way too soon :/ I know its only lust but i just keep thinking I love him. I do wish the sex was a bit spicier though as hes quite inexperienced compared to me. But time will fix that :D Hes just so perfect for me and I keep pushing him away because having such strong feelings makes me feel vulnerable :/
Great idea for a thread by the way. Im sure I will use it a lot :) xx