Am needing a bit of advice please. Last night my OH suggested that seeing as I like my realistic dildo & him together would I like a real cock & him? The conversation then progressed to would i like another male & female with us. But we wouldn't be one on one, it would be all 4 together.
My oh has said we would make the rules, we decide what happens etc & that he's going to leave this with me to think about, but if I do he know a couple he's played with before & can arrange it. IF I want. (His sexual past is a LOT more colourful than mine!). He said that he's mentioned it as I'm more kinkier than him and sometimes he struggles to keep up with my kink level :(
Here's the problem. I like the idea, however, I'm a very jealous girlie & the thought of another girl doing what I do with my bloke is a big no no. Has anyone done this and kept their relationship together?
Mornin MJ, I have never personally had a threesome or a foursome for exactly that reason - jealousy..... You have do what feels comfortable for you but if you say that you would feel jealous, then I don't think it would work. You would probably just end up feeling lots of resentment which would not be good.
You are going to have to go with your gut feeling on this one. You sound like you have a very healthy sex life anyway, so I am sure your OH will be happy with whatever deision you make xxx
I would personally leave it as a fantasy, it wouldn't turn out how you imagine and could be quite damaging to your relationship, pandoras box. Keep having fun
Morning Scorpius, thanks for the reply. I think I will just say to stick to toys & fantasy. I would be insanely jealous, which isn't good for anyone involved. We have a really healthy sex life already & talk quite openly about what we like & don't like so he won't be bothered if I say to just stick with our toys on this one.
I'm really grateful that there is this forum for me to ask this type of question as I don't think my friends who don't have toys would understand. ;-)
Thanks jeffngloria. I don't want to damage our relationship & I have a feeling that this might. Once you start something like this, there would always be that doubt in my mind which is dangerous! Leaving this one well alone!
Morning Scorpius, thanks for the reply. I think I will just say to stick to toys & fantasy. I would be insanely jealous, which isn't good for anyone involved.
We have a really healthy sex life already & talk quite openly about what we like & don't like so he won't be bothered if I say to just stick with our toys on this one.
I'm really grateful that there is this forum for me to ask this type of question as I don't think my friends who don't have toys would understand. ;-)
It's always good to bounce your ideas off someone else - that's why the forums are so great! Happy to chat any time :)
I wonder about this all the time, my oh would like to have a threesome with another woman or swing with another couple, sometimes i think it would be fun and then other times I think I would hate it because I'd be so jealous! We are looking into attending a couples night at a local swingers club, I still can't make up my mind! X
The fact that your commenting on here for advice means that you're not entirely comfortable with it. Anything that you're not comfortable with, don't do.
I'm also a highly jealous person, I hate women even looking at my husband! I couldn't imagine having to share him with someone else!
If you're not comfortable with it, don't do it. If you think this could somehow affect your relationship mentally, emotionally it physically, don't do it. Your relationship is more important and it sounds like to me that this will affect your relationship in some way.
Hope you come to a conclusion that makes you happy :)
It's my biggest fantasy but I couldn't let another women touch Simon. It would eat away at me and I wouldn't be able to get the imagine of him pleasuring her our or my head . I would have happily done it when I wasn't in a serious relationship but I couldn't risk ruining my relationship with my babies daddy x
I've had a FMM threesome with a couple of friends, but I drew the line at x going into y with them. It wasn't planned, I wasn't in a relationship with either of them, we just just rather drunk and after getting off with one of them the other one said they felt left out so I dragged them both back into the tent (naughty me!)
HOWEVER. I wasn't even in a realstionship with either of them and I felt hurt for a few weeks after when one totally ignored me, and the other started paying a lot of attention to another girl. I wouldn't recommend it for a couple unless you really think you can take it, I know I couldn't. xx
I've had a FMM threesome with a couple of friends, but I drew the line at x going into y with them. It wasn't planned, I wasn't in a relationship with either of them, we just just rather drunk and after getting off with one of them the other one said they felt left out so I dragged them both back into the tent (naughty me!)
HOWEVER. I wasn't even in a realstionship with either of them and I felt hurt for a few weeks after when one totally ignored me, and the other started paying a lot of attention to another girl. I wouldn't recommend it for a couple unless you really think you can take it, I know I couldn't. xx
Hi dosnt seam like you have had much advise to help you out yet
We have spoke about the same thing my man wants us to have a MFM 3 some for me to enjoy and experience having a great night of NSA fun with him and a guy we pick
I do like the idea of getting anougher man to join us so I can get/have my first experience of being pleasuered by with them with the knowing that my man is there as well so I know it would go well and I could relax in knowing that
I have siad that I would rather has a couple 4 some first
But if you both trust each other and take your time like we/do are and find the right person we are sure you both or any 1 at that matter can have a great time and experience
Just make sure you relax and find the right people for you
We have had both a foursome and a threesome as weve been swinging for nearly 3 years now.
I will be completely honest, the first time we had a foursome was on our first club meet (previously we had small meets "soft swaps" with guys) and the first time (and him with me and other men) i was extremely jealous and i felt a little strange but at the same time i felt very turned on by it and after we both had a cuddle went over what we liked and wether we still felt comfortable and had even more amazing sex together.
We've had alot more since then but i guess its not an issue as much anymore as im tuned into him enjoying himself. Im always watching him and him me and i know at the end of it im his and hes mine.
As a thought have you tried thinking about a "soft swap"? This would just entail oral swapping partners and having sex with your own partner. Its easier than taking the big jump.
I guess the most important thing i can give you here is dont do it just to make him happy weve seen so many of these scenarios go wrong so if you feel uncomfortable and out of your zone tell him. A strong caring and trusting relationship is very important just as much as talking :).
This is something we want to try. We've talked about it a lot and talk to other couples via IM when we have sex etc. We are waiting for the right time after we have our baby (and I get back into shape) then we'll start looking :) x
Hi everyone, Thanks for the advice. We've had a chat about this at some length and both decided that we'll leave it as a fantasy. We've brought a blackout blindfold to enhance our play and already have a suction toy & are considering getting a squeal 2 too!
We've discussed this as well and we've come close to it happening but decided against it last minute as it was someone we knew and didn't want it being uncomfirtable afterwards, and we discussed it again and both were keen on it and even discussed maybe meeting with an escort in a hotel so that it wouldn't be uncomfortable if we saw them out but my OH was worried that seeing me with another woman would upset her which is something I would hate to do and her feelings are the most important thing so we disucced rules etc and decided what is acceptable and not.
Anyway we had a kid and this was put to the back burner and at the moment it's not something we are thinking about but who knows, maybe it might be something we'll consider again or not....
In short I think it;s something that you both have to be happy with and both agree with or else it could cause serious issues....
Now my OH loves just watching FFM Porn, using dildos and I've just bought a Sqweel 2 so we are more than happy.
On another note my OH is only interested in FFM is this similar for most women?
We've discussed this as well and we've come close to it happening but decided against it last minute as it was someone we knew and didn't want it being uncomfirtable afterwards, and we discussed it again and both were keen on it and even discussed maybe meeting with an escort in a hotel so that it wouldn't be uncomfortable if we saw them out but my OH was worried that seeing me with another woman would upset her which is something I would hate to do and her feelings are the most important thing so we disucced rules etc and decided what is acceptable and not.
Anyway we had a kid and this was put to the back burner and at the moment it's not something we are thinking about but who knows, maybe it might be something we'll consider again or not....
In short I think it;s something that you both have to be happy with and both agree with or else it could cause serious issues....
Now my OH loves just watching FFM Porn, using dildos and I've just bought a Sqweel 2 so we are more than happy.
On another note my OH is only interested in FFM is this similar for most women?
Thats good M-J, Im really glad things worked out for you and you both ended in some naughty fun ;p x
We havent swung with friends infact none of them know and to be honest i wouldnt of had a mmf or a ffm if it was with a friend or someone we knew in some way. Its just alot easier once weve played with others they leave and we maybe or not at all see them again.
Im interested in both, when my OH suggested it i thought he wanted a ffm but our first threesome was with another guy as he wanted to see me with another man. x
I personsally could never do a 3sum or 4sum as I couldnt handle someone else being with my man I would be jeasouls . Yes maybe fun but you got to handle the feelings afterwards which can be a hold mixture of a can of worms . Each to their own someone people love it and can handle it some cant .
We would advise not involving vanilla friends. It's a good way to lose them, in our experience.
The key is discussion beforehand to set boundaries (and KEEP to them when playing!) and choosing someone and somewhere you are comfortable with. But you never know how you will react until you see your OH with someone else. We both loved the sight, but some people can't cope with it.
We got married 2 years after starting swinging and have been happily married ever since, despite swinging regularly. We both know it is only recreational sex, not a result of us missing something in our own relationship.