Does Anyone have any advice for Internet dating with M.E/C.F.S?

Off-Topic Chat
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It will take you a bit of time to get used to it, 1 other tip in the privacy section would be to hide yourself from being shown on the ‘who viewed my profile’ section, only subscribers have that but people seem to think that because you’ve looked at their profile that you’re willing to sleep with them lol that helps eliminate that but I do also enjoyed perving in secret lol

I haven’t logged into fab since Feb, I would go to the Lounge in the UK forum that one will have a lot of people. I mainly went to the Irish forum and then within those you’ll have the different topics. Its strange to begin with because some people will be very cliquey but just bounce in and participate.

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I wonder if you could tell people, if the topic comes up, that you have Long COVID rather than ME?

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I would caution against any lies (especially early in a possible relationship), no matter how close to the truth they are, as it is unlikely that it will be overlooked if discovered later on. It is easy to destroy trust and much harder to rebuild it.

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Yeah, id rather be strait up with people. Even if i then have to explain what M.E./CFS is to them.
Effort is worth it in the long run.

@GoGirl12 have been considering this. Not sure what there is locally though (besides gig rowing). Most of the clubs im aware of arent really my generation or would mostly only really appeal to women

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@Green_Eyed_Girl you’re right about the time it takes to wade through the messages. I have actually just added some of the privacy settings that @JoCat mentioned. I think at the moment, in regards to your profile you just need to note things that make you you at this given time. Show who you are at the moment as this can change often as we grow and so can your profile. You can change or add things as your time and connections become more extensive. If anything you could note it as a quirk so something like “a woman you loves to give her all but only to those who deserve it as this sexy mama has a quirk to go with her sassy fun loving self”. I don’t know what would sound good as I’m rubbish at this but you know, something to show there’s more but you have to dig deeper.

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One of the things i did is i wrote a few sentences about my likes and dislikes. Its something i picked up from the dating sites. Giving a little overview of yourself.

Example:
I am an Addicted bookworm, enthusiastic baker, movie buff, and gardener with a love of wild swimming, good coffee and all things involving a pair of walking boots.

You dont have to list everything, but a few of your likes and hobbies in a light fun sentence structure gives people a little feel of who you are as a person

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You’re so much better at this than me :smiley: I think that’s a great example and ticks a lot of boxes for many people.

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Trick is to be concise. Try and condense things into bite size snippets.

So you could say
Lover of good coffee
Or
Coffee addict.

Keen hiker, nature lover, addicted to heavy metal and anything chocolate. Etc etc

Hopefully that helps.
Doesnt have to be exhaustive (there is no way you can condense one person into a sentence) but it just gives a sense of who you are a tad and Gives people something to ask about

I find doing it on a piece of paper (or notebook program) helps. You can scrub stuff out and tweak bits nice and easily and shove words around till it feels good when you read it :smile:

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That’s great idea about writing it down first. It always seems like a lot of pressure to write something with that flashing bar waiting for the words that could define you lol

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  1. Round here, going to the pub seems to be most people do. Not really my thing but i am seriously considering resorting to it to meet people.
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@Green_Eyed_Girl I did online dating (mainly paid for) for 2 1/2 years and although i chatted to some nice guys and had some dates from which i now have 3 male friends, i became quite disillusioned with it all plus it can become quite addictive.
I decided last November to pay for one final month on a well known dating site and if nothing came of it then i was going to stop using them and get on with my life.
I matched with a guy that had the most honest and heartfelt profile i have ever read. We met on the 1st December at the local Sainsbury’s cafe and spent 4 hours just talking about our lives, divorces and interests.
I never believed in love at first sight but nearly 9 months later and with hardly a day apart, i can honestly say ive met the man of my dreams and we intend to spend the rest of our lives together.
I’m 57 and he’s 56 and it is a total and lovely surprise to find a partner at our ages let alone on a dating site

The best advice i can give you is to be very specific about the type of man you want and don’t deviate from it. My mantra was always I’d rather be alone than be with the wrong man.

Sorry for the long post but we’re proof that dating sites can work.

Good luck x

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Privacy settings on fab are important or you’ll get bombarded. Ultimately the majority of people are on there for sex so do bear that in mind, you can use it any way that you wish.

I made better connections by using the forums because I could chat to people without letting down the ‘drawbridge’ and giving them access to message me. Those are the people that are up for chatting and potentially open to more than just hookups.

My profile is very abrasive lol it basically tells people not to message me and it worked, people thought I was a bitch until I spoke to them in the forums :tipping_hand_man:t2:
I don’t have my current profile text saved in my notes but I have my previous one if any of you want to have a read of it. It was quite thorough (long) lol

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good to hear a success story. Im so happy for you both. My issue is that the poulation of dating sites in my area is very very low. I will have a few as 12 guys to pick from before i start having to look 2+hrs drive away type distances

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Those are not great odds!

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This gives me hope!

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Sadly, no :frowning:

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@JoCat I’d like to see that if you don’t mind. I think I left mine too open but I can always change that when I’ve had enough of people messaging me.

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Yes of course…I’ll try and remember my password and get my current profile text.

Pleasure - “a fundamental feeling that is hard to define, but that people desire to experience”…“sensual gratification or indulgence”…“feeling of euphoria”…

The build-up, tease, chase, breathless excitement, the kiss. Sensual dominance from a confident man, teasing me into submission. Kissing is a must, it tells me everything.

I like conversation, friendship, laughing, making my head spin, making your head spin. Pleasure goes both ways.

Socials first, always in a public place…I could be a serial killer, ya just never know :wink:

If you send a dick pic in your first message or if the majority of your public photos are various angles of your cock, that’s not going to do anything for me. I look at the whole photo…backgrounds included and a toilet is not sexy! Remotes and deodorant cans…seriously?!! Take a photo with a soda can under your cock, let’s see how much of the can shows…that would be much more impressive…

I am trimmed and shaved, honestly I want trimmed and tidy at a minimum, the alternative is a turn off. All those hairy dick pics on profiles from years ago, just make me wonder if a razor has been bought since then. Tidy yo bits! insert gang symbol here

I’m going to need to see your face, please attach clear photos (as will I). Happy to cam chat as an alternative to photos if that is your preference. Just give me a wee bit of notice to fix my hair :wink:

I don’t want to be involved with anyone who is not single. Do what you want, but not with me.

I love a bit of cheeky banter, I laugh a lot and i’m ok with my crinkly eyes. I’m not the girlie type, you’ll probably never see me in a dress. Don’t ask me what I’m going to wear. I’m going to wear clothes.

I drink whiskey, I vape, I have tattoos, I have some darkness in me but I am a sweetheart if you handle me right.

“Pleasure is a sin and sometimes sin is a pleasure”.

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@bexltonline This is my more recent one thats currently hidden. You’ll notice a distinct lack of patience in this one lol

Don’t ask to meet, I will say no.

Please check your spelling and don’t put your dick in my inbox. Dirty nails & birds nest pubes don’t appeal to me.
I have a dwindling amount of patience and no problem blocking people. I would block myself if I could.

Contrary to my ‘looking for’ I do like single men, but I will find who I want myself.
Mens updates are fucking woeful, therefore I have everyone in my shopping basket. Its not entirely untrue. If I’m interested, then I’m interested regardless of gender. Or I would be, if I was meeting :wink:

Don’t use x’s with me, I think its creepy. I know its habit for people but it really tells me you’ve not read this or you’re deliberately making my eye twitch. Don’t do this.

Mmmms make me think of dirty old men with an old playboy with the pages stuck together. This is not an image I want in my head. The more m’s, the more disturbing it is for me.

Other icks are calling me babe, gorgeous, sexy. Just don’t. My name is at the top & the bottom. Pick one.
My personality is prickly at best, but thats just part of my charm & I think I’m hilarious.

I hope this has thoroughly put everyone off. Except bi men, I’ll be nice to you.

Jo.

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Ok, this is going to sound like a stupid question, but i need to ask it. How quickly do you guys usually meet up with people? I know you cant tell till youve met someone if you will have good chemistry with them, but my approach to online dating is more of “poke things with long stick” end of the spectrum.

Is there a good in between?
Some people Seem to want to meet up really fast after an initial message.