My Reviews

[Green_Eyed_Girl]

by @Green_Eyed_Girl , 30/9/21
lovehoney plus size desert princess costume

An Exotic Adventure

Escaped (or not) harem slave, genie, exotic princess (or queen), belly dancer, priestess, theres lots of fun options for this outfit. Its even great if you want to play matahari and extract information from your unwitting mark.

The fabric on the skirt is soft and swishes beautifully with every movement. The deep purple colour is really fabulous in person and very eye catching. The sheer quality of it is also very pretty, especially across the back and leg. As an 18/20 on the bottom i felt the sizing was reasonable. The straps on the skirt are elasticated and very adjustable.

The fabric on the skirt is very wide and covers the front and back well, though the sheerness of the fabric makes it more revealing than it feels. the front panel is also very deep, and depending how low on the waste you want it to sit, can cover anything your a bit shy about on the front.

The thong is sadly sewn into the outfit, so you cant wear it without, but its very comfortable and thin enough it could be moved out of the way without removing the skirt part.

The bra is gorgeous when on. The purple fabric is soft with minimal stretch and though beautiful, as a 16 on top with a B cup did take a couple of attempts to get it to sit flat. The straps of the halterneck are slightly stretchy, but as a plus size could admittedly be longer round the back. Its roughly 55inches/140cm from end to end of the strap running under the bust, so If you have a very large bust size you may struggle to get them to reach around the back.

The cuffs are a soft loop with no fastenings. They’re one size with minimal stretch and on my admittedly childsized wrists where loose enough to sag significantly. I did manage to get them over my large hands though, and as someone who routinely fails to find solid bangles i can put on i feel they’d be a decent size for most. They are very pretty though and for some fun roleplay very comfortable to wear. So if you can get your hand through the 9inch/23cm (when stretched) loop, i think theyr good fun.

The best bit though is that the chains are metal, feel robust and are removable at both the hip and wrist via a pair of lobster clasps. This makes the outfit not only more flexible but also allows you to switch out the gold fabric for any bondage cuffs you happen to have if you wanted something a little more heavy duty. I really love this inclusion, its incredibly simple yet adds so many options to the outfit.

The collar has a velcro fastening, and fitted my 14.5inch/37cm neck comfortably with some space. The fabric is only slightly stretchy though and the velcro doesn’t have a massive amount of adjustment. it looked nice on, was comfortable and very light.

Despite its flaws i loved this outfit. Its incredibly light and floaty, to the point where you barely feel your wearing it at times. The collars and cuffs feel slightly like an afterthought, but As its a costume i feel i can forgive that. They are going to either fit or not though so be prepared for them to be either loose or snug as you cant really adjust them. The overall look is gorgeous though, but What i loved most was the versatility of this piece. its really one for so many scenarios, All you need to add is a little imagination

Overall Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Pros: Beautiful, Versatile, comfortable and very sexy. Need i say more

Cons: Cuffs and collar not adjustable. Bra ties could be longer. One size may not fit all sadly

Bottom Line: Despite its flaws i loved this piece. Its Incredibly sexy, versatile and comfortable.

[Mint-Monster]

by @Mint-Monster , 26/4/2021
Lovehoney Mindful ECONYL® Fishnet Long Sleeve Top

Caught Up

Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this to review.

Gotta love the eco-friendly packaging from the get-go. There’s very little imagery or description on the box, so you could get it as a surprise gift for someone. Having the knowledge that it’s made from recycled materials adds to the feel good factor. Turning fish nets into swish nets. At close inspection, it looks more tatty or woolly than other net-gear I own. This doesn’t mean it’s not nice to wear, though. It’s soft and has lots of stretch which didn’t feel like it was going to tear if I pulled it. Comfortably wore it all day.

Like most netting, you just have to take care not to get your digits caught up in it when putting it on. Its stretchiness makes it slightly awkward when removing it and it tends to get turned inside out. I’ve put it back on sometimes this way by mistake (you can tell by the stitching on the rims). Generally, not too fiddly getting it on or off, though.

The top has a different cut on each side so you can pick one that suits you. One is more scooped and the other is higher. I’m not a fan of low cut tops in general, so I much preferred the latter. When I did try wearing the scooped side at the front, I didn’t like how the band felt on my chest and shoulders either like it wasn’t balanced between them or something. Might be just me?

The ends of the sleeves hang very loosely off my arms which isn’t very flattering. Like they have nothing to grip to? Not quite like the photo for me. However, there’s an easy fix of just looping my thumb through the netting to make them look like flirty fingerless gloves. Very punk/goth! They still felt a tad loose, but looked way better. This style also looked great under a t-shirt. The part around my midriff is nicely shaped and fitted well along with the rest of the top. I loved how it made my small boobs look and when my nipples popped out the netting. My partner was also a fan of the look and said it complimented my frame and style. The net obscures little imperfections like zits for example, so don’t worry too much about insecurities. I like the scale-ish appearance it gives on the arms, too.

With my trusty mesh bag I use for all my lingerie, it survived a spin in the washing machine without many lint clingers. It dried pretty quickly and didn’t seem to feel distorted or stretched out after multiple uses.

Overall, this is a nice bit of netting. Doesn’t fit in some areas like my arms, but this can be worked around and the rest is damn fine. Also great for sexy fashion outside the bedroom. Oh, and it’s mindful of the environment which is always plus.

(My photos here)

Overall Rating: 4/5

Pros: How it made my small boobs and nipples look. 2 cuts to choose from. Stretchy. Recycled.

Cons: Arms hang loose. Not a fan of the scooped side.

Bottom Line: Great to wear even out the bedroom. Some fitting issues, but can still be worked around to rock out.

[Mint-Monster]

by @Mint-Monster , 5/4/2021
Dorcel Deep Expand Inflatable G-Spot Vibrator

Poppin’

Is it just me or does this look like a tadpole gun? Stick 'em up and reach for the skies, you’re in for a surprise! As someone who loves knots, I just had to get myself a vibrating one. Quality is very good and the silicone is smooth despite not being seamless. The toy is rigid apart from the end half of the shaft which has some squish to it. There’s also a nice bit of weight to this risqué revolver and it comes with its own holster… err, I mean satin storage bag.

The shaft itself and how it inflates is so futuristic. It doesn’t give you the impression that it even has this trump card as it’s super sleek. It can just seamlessly form a head right out of that. Very impressive! Don’t worry about it exploding as it will automatically stop inflating when it’s full. The curved shape ensures G-spot pressure is easily achieved in either form. I also loved the big head around my opening - popping the knot in and out. Not as big as my other inflatable knotter, but big enough to notice and this also has an edge of being a vibrator. The air in there gives it some softness so it’s comfortable to use, too. Good for new and experienced users as you can pick a girth that works for you.

The vibes are satisfyingly rumbly and deep. Great externally or internally. The impact on the G-spot can be pretty intense as they travel well where it matters. I would say a little vibe power is lost when fully inflated, but the added girth balances it out. The sound isn’t too bad and it muffles when inserted. However, it tends to make a loud reverberating growl when it’s fully blown up which can be a bit jarring when removed. The 3 constant speeds are great, but I’m not a fan of the long pause or 2-in-1 patterns it has. There’s a few good jittery ones near the back of the selection, though.

The loop handle design is interesting. Texture on the front part makes it act like a rabbit (even almost hands-free). The vibes can run through the loop somewhat for extra clit stimulation. However, you can also feel the tingle in your fingers as you hold it. If your clit needs a lot of power then this may not be enough alone. Luckily, low-mid vibes are my jam and those grooves really help. I’ve been able to get some great orgasms in its rabbit form by rocking it or quickly thrusting it to get them to hit right. I enjoyed it both laying on my front and back. You can also pair it with a different clit vibe of your choice if you just shift the loop over. Loved it with my wand and bullets.

Unfortunately, the handle can send me loopy at times. This is more to do with the button positions and their sensitivity. They are in the danger zone of being accidentally pressed and it happened quite often. This seemed to be the top and bottom buttons more than anything which deflate or change the vibe setting for the toy. The deflator only requires the slightest touch to whoosh all that air out which is a pain because it takes about 10 seconds to blow up again while sounding like an electric pump - and that’s after you wait for the deflator light to go off, too. Ugh. Talk about knocking your game off. Sometimes pressing the vibe button will make it jump two levels instead of one. I wish the set up could be rearranged or the buttons less skittish. Like putting the deflator in the middle, for example? You just have to be careful with how you hold it (which can be pretty hard when you’re all excited and wild). Even with my small digits, I could only fit one finger or thumb in the hole at a time. The little lip at the back prevents it from slipping your grasp at least.

Charging is simple with the prong-to-port method. I also liked that the charge wire has a Dorcel tag already on it so I can tell it apart from the rest. It seems to last about 45-60 minutes on a single charge depending on your power setting. When mine ran out of juice, I was pleased that it still remained inflated so I could at least finish off with that fun feature. It’s pretty easy to clean, but be careful not to get it too waterlogged as it’s only splash proof. Some brushing on the plastic-to-silicone and button parts is all the extra attention that’s needed.

Overall, this is an impressive and enjoyable vibe. The orgasms I got out of it could hit really hard in any way I chose to use it. Sensation from the inflation was great and the rumbly vibes gelled well with me. The only things mainly letting it down are the buttons and noise (Ba dum tss. Get it? Ugh). Fun, fab and futuristic despite a few flaws.

Overall Rating: 4/5

Pros: Deep rumbly vibes. Inflation power. Quality. Storage bag. G-spot attention. Cleaning. Big orgasms.

Cons: Button sensitivity and placement. Loud when inflated. Awkward to hold at times. Only splash proof.

Bottom Line: The future is here. Built for intense orgasms despite having a few gripes.

[Mint-Monster]

by @Mint-Monster , 11/3/2021
Vive Shiatsu Rechargeable Textured Massage Wand Vibrator

The Poison Mushroom Wand

Look at it! Just look at it! What a funky looking fungi. The overall presentation and box is nice and gives a sense of quality. You can store it in there like an antique or in a long LH satin bag. However, it feels a bit less luxurious than expected when you handle it. For a start it’s really lightweight for its size. Thought those shiny bits were metal? Nope, it’s just cheap ol’ ABS plastic which is a bit disappointing. Despite this, it’s still firm and sturdy enough to survive play.

The vibes for the wand head are pretty decent. A bit loud, but have a fun rumble at least. The wideness of it delivers that blissful broad stimulation to my bits and the vibes aren’t too strong for me as I go for mid strength ones. Just right. Those bumps add some extra spice, too. Makes turning and nudging it more satisfying - with or without lube. As well as providing extra grip, they also give a tickly sensation if you hold it lightly over your body. It feels like it’s padded with a sponge under the silicone. There’s some bend in the neck, but not too much.

The overall size can make it a bit cumbersome to use. The dildo tail feels too long and it’s hard to manoeuvre when under a duvet (like I’m trying to spin a baton). I don’t hold it at the handle, but at its main body and shoulders for both ways which is pretty nice to grip. Great for getting some firm pressure on my bits.

Even though this is half vibrating dildo, it’s easy to forget about it. In fact, it’s probably better that you do. While the firm angle can reach your G-spot with ease, the vibrations are absolutely abysmal. I can barely feel them. It’s like they’re so deep within that nothing can surface or something. It makes a high pitched buzzy noise with nothing to show for it. Dimensions are also on the small/slim side. The instructions didn’t mention how to fully use the controls and I had to look online like even the maker wanted us to forget about the dildo. Just to be in the know, you hold the middle and bottom button to get it on and the opposite for the wand. You can also have both on at the same time (for some reason). The wand will come on automatically if you just press the middle button, too.

Speaking of controls and settings, they often make no sense. There’s 3 constant speeds at the start and then a 4th as you scroll through half the rest? Holding the plus button unlocks the “insta-orgasm” mode that’s just a quick pulse pattern with added strobe light. To be fair, it did make me climax but so did most of the other settings. Not sure what all the song and flash dance is for. Probably better to cover the light with your hand as it’s quite bright and distracting. The way you hold it can make accidental presses easier, but at least you can quickly return using the plus/minus buttons to scroll back.

Thankfully, it’s waterproof to make cleaning it easier as the design aspects can be a pain. Dirt can get trapped around each individual head bump (Yes!) and plastic-to-silicone parts. You basically have to take a brush to the whole thing which can make cleaning time longer. The battery life lasts ages and it’s easy to charge, too.

I know I sound like a negative Nancy throughout this review, but I do genuinely enjoy the wand head - it’s the best part of the mushroom, after all. However, the rest of it seems all over the place like it’s still in the middle of being designed. Some individual aspects are good, but when combined it becomes a bit clustered. Why are the dildo vibes so weak and the wand’s good? Why does it need all those button codes? Not a bad toy, but definitely room for improvement. A little tweaking here and there from the wand head down. It also makes it a bit overpriced if half the toy is lacking instead of packing. I have better wands than it that cost nowhere near as much. It has the glamour spell cast, but I’m not quite enchanted by the whole thing.

Overall Rating: 3/5

Pros: Interesting looks. Fun bumps. Battery life. Rumbly wand vibes. Box. Sturdy for firm pressure.

Cons: Feels a bit cheap. Weak dildo vibes. Cleaning. Button controls and brightness. Noise.

Bottom Line: I would probably give the wand head a 4 and the dildo a 2. Making the overall score a rough 3.

[Mint-Monster]

by @Mint-Monster , 17/3/2021
Lovehoney Colour Your Pleasure Colouring Book

Relax and Focus

Many thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this to review.

In these unsettling times, I find myself being drawn more towards doodling and colouring books just to wind down in the evening. I also like to do them during work as it can help me concentrate. Well, definitely working from home that is. I don’t think it’s the most office friendly, is it? There’s nothing that rude or smutty in it - mainly sex toys that you can find on this website. Even the front page looks pretty cute and flirty. Quite tame overall, but maybe that’s because I’m used to all this.

There are 30 projects in total which range from simple to god-level complexity! As with any decent colouring book, the page under the colouring one is usually left blank to prevent it bleeding through to the next project. Lovehoney have been a tad more creative by covering it with the logo pattern and having a funny quote to accompany the project on the other side. I’m not sure if this is intentional or not, but there’s no page/illustration numbers. However, there’s an LH logo under each project where I think they would probably be. Or maybe they’re tick boxes? Either way, I’ve just been writing numbers in there myself.

If you shop on the site regularly then you’re sure to recognise a few goodies in here. Toys and kinky accessories are the focus. I guess the outlines aren’t that impressive by themselves - it’s when they’re swirled and spiralled into mini works of art that’s the real eye candy, though. Almost like naughty snowflakes. These can be rewarding to complete and look fondly upon with some being more challenging than others.

One of my little gripes is that the outlines can be super skinny which makes it much easier to go outside of them by accident. Please excuse me while I grab my magnifying glass. Ahh! It’s like it can be relaxing and formidable at the same time (unless I just suck at colouring)? Maybe I’m over thinking. So long as you have fun that’s all that counts, right? I also noticed that some of the lines seemed to cross over each other or get cut off near the bottom of the page? Intentional maybe? Not a big issue, just a nit-picky observation.

Some of the same toy outlines are repeated throughout the book, so it can get a tad repetitive at times. I know LH have a wide variety of toys so I’m surprised more weren’t used. For example, there seemed to be a lack of butt-plugs despite having quite iconic shapes. However, most of the page patterns/designs change it up enough to keep things more interesting. I wish there were more toy outlines thrown in or even human ones with them - mainly so I can give them mad, alien skin tones.

The size is decent for a colouring book as it’s small enough to carry around or stash in a drawer. The paper stock isn’t bad and will generally take whatever you dish at it. I used a range of pens and pencils and they were fine. The only thing that bled through were marker-like pens and even then it didn’t affect the next project. My favourite tools were coloured biros and standard felt tips. Fine liners also came in handy for some of the more complex designs.

I’ve actually had another sex toy colouring book in the past, but this Lovehoney one is more fun in my opinion. It would make a cheeky little gift for someone who enjoys adult colouring books. Quite pricey at £10 for what it is, though. It can lack variety in places, but some of the page designs are pretty jaw-dropping even before you start colouring. I like the way there’s a range of complexity depending on your skill or mood, too. For a small book, it will definitely keep you occupied for a while and maybe even give you some ideas for future purchases.

Overall Rating: 4/5

Pros: Creative patterns. Size. Mix of difficulties. Rewarding results. Will keep you busy.

Cons: Skinny outlines. Repetitive images. Pricey.

Bottom Line: Nice to wind down with. It’s also like an advert for Lovehoney goodies.

[Mint-Monster]

by @Mint-Monster , 4/3/2021
Lovehoney Mindful Mint Green Leopard Print Seamless Body

Hold on Tight

Muchas gracias to Lovehoney for sending me this to review.

The thick but breathable material is nice and soft - similar to that of sportswear. The pattern and colour choice is also cute - animal like yet not too wild. It may be seamless, but the markings on one side don’t quite line up right. Not a big deal, though. The mint band gives the illusion of either wearing a belt or a spotted two piece. If you wear leggings or tights underneath, then they will show up to this line. You can also throw it in with the rest of your clothes and underwear when it comes to cleaning.

This leotard has a clasp for the crotch so you don’t have to take the whole thing off when you want use the loo or something. At first, the corner parts of the fabric where the buttons are were pretty sharp. Ow! I rounded them off with a pair of scissors, so everything is safe down there now. Even though there is a cotton crotch protector, I still prefer to wear a thong under it to avoid being on the fabric (and mainly because I always do with leotards).

So what’s it like to wear? Snug and tight come to mind. While the overall material has a bit of give, the black edges aren’t as kind. This can create more of a muffin top effect in some areas like my back, butt and thighs - more double-butt than bubble-butt. The material also seems to like gravitating to my ass crack. Less obvious with jeans over it, not so much with leggings. It’s started to go slightly bobbly on the area where my lower back is (probably from sitting or rubbing on jeans), but nothing a debobbler or razor couldn’t sort if it got worse.

There is some support for my breasts thanks to the material and I felt comfortable enough to go out with a shirt over it. Because of their small size, they don’t require much to begin with. They even held up somewhat during my regular exercises with a bit of jiggle. I’m not sure how well this would go with larger breasts, though. It basically flattens mine like a swimming costume. The speckles can break up the appearance of erect nipples, too. Even though I’ve adjusted the straps to their loosest position, it still feels tight on my back and shoulders (which also can leave marks). It reminds me of those posture correcting harnesses. The ring clasp also makes creaking sounds now and again as you move around. Seems like it climbs up and clings like a baby monkey, too. It was a relief to get it off after a while to give my back and shoulders a rest.

I’m a UK size 8 and the garment is noted as S/M which I usually take as size 8-10? Unless it means Asian size or something which would be much smaller. The general rule for this is to order at least one size up to cover the size difference. I think I would recommend the same for this leotard. Then again, it could be down to my proportions as I have quite broad shoulders and a big ass. I would have still thought the max M size would be more forgiving. On a plus note, it keeps me warm and cinches in at the middle just right. Some of my body suits can miss this sweet spot so I’m happy about that.

It may look cute, but it isn’t the most comfortable garment once you get it on. Some areas are more flattering and comfy than others, however, it’s hard to ignore the parts that aren’t.

(My photos here)

Overall Rating: 3/5

Pros: Pattern and colours. Quality. Cinches in the waist nicely. Keeps me warm.

Cons: Feels tight on the back. Black edges can create a muffin top effect in places. Creaky straps.

Bottom Line: Looks cute, but has some bite to it (and not the kind I like). Wearable and at times unbearable.

[Mint-Monster]

by @Mint-Monster , 3/3/2021
Lovehoney Mindful Mint Green Leopard Print Seamless Bra Set

Speckly Beast

Many thanks to Lovehoney for sending me this set to review.

Generally, everything feels well made. The recycled material is like that thick but breathable kind used for sportswear (similar to leggings). Soft when you run your hands on it. I love all things animal print and this reminds me of an adorable snow leopard. The mint green also matches my username on here.

The simple top is like a sports bra and vest crossbreed. There’s no padding - just the snug material for support by basically flattening things. I don’t have much in the way of boobs to begin with, so that means less support is needed. I’m not sure how it would fare with a bigger chest, though? I felt comfortable enough to wear it under a shirt, go out shopping and do my regular exercise routine. The straps are adjustable and having them at the loosest position felt best for me as I have quite broad shoulders. I don’t own any proper bras, so this fits right in with the rest of my underwear drawer. Even though I usually don’t go for V-neck cuts, it’s still nice to wear. Sometimes the V will drop slightly with enough activity and press against me. Pulling it back up sorts it, though. Erect nipples will show through the material somewhat, but they can be camouflaged slightly by the spots.

I wore the bra for several days without issues…Well, except that one annoying issue with the noise of it. I’m not sure if it’s because I haven’t wore real bras in years and I’m not used to the sound, but the strap adjusters creak more than a haunted house. It makes me wonder if it’s because of the cross ring connector at the back or something? Couldn’t really say as none of my other bras have anything similar to compare. Each movement gets a little “eee” from them. Maybe it needs some oil? Love the bra, otherwise.

The thong is more on the tight side. The spotted and light green parts of the set have a bit of stretch which adds more comfort while you wear it. However, the black trim sections are less forgiving and gave me a little of that muffin top effect around the hips which I’m not keen on. A pair of jeans could cover this, leggings not so much. They aren’t tight enough to be uncomfortable or unwearable and is more of a visual thing for me. On a positive note, it seems to make my butt cheeks jut out like a pair of bubbles at certain angles. Really makes it pop when you slowly take your pants off. Gives off the casual but sexy gym vibe. Oh! And the inner cotton protector lines up perfectly with my bits which is rare for me.

Both can be thrown in with the rest of the washing. One of the nice things about the bra is there are no pads to worry about - I hate fiddling to get them back in place with my other ones. Funnily enough, the bra straps didn’t creak as much after a wash. Like I cleaned the noise away?

These arrived as size S/M, but even as a UK size 8 some of the gear was a tad tight. I thought that M would let it have more give than it does. However, I think this is more due to the snug material and trimmings (could just be my big ass and hips, though). The bra fits well at least and will be in my regular rotation for wear - I just wish it would stop nagging at me…

(My photos here)

Overall Rating: 4/5

Pros: Cool pattern and colours. Quality. The bra overall and no padding to deal with. Ass popping thong.

Cons: Creaky strap adjusters. Black trimming muffin tops my hips a bit.

Bottom Line: I’ll definitely be using the bra, but wish the thong trimming was more forgiving as an S/M size.

[Ian_Chimp]

by @Ian_Chimp, 12 Aug 2021
Happy Rabbit Clitoral Pleasure Kit (4 Piece)

This is a really cute…

This is a really cute self-contained little clit kit. The silicone pouch is a nice size, and easily fits the blindfold, balm, and toy inside, with plenty of space to chuck a couple of extra little treats in too.

The pouch is good quality, with a lockable zip too (lock not included), and ‘WOW’ embossed three times on the side (Mrs Chimp was rather tickled that it reads as ‘MOM’ when upside-down). FYI, the silicone rabbit ears are absolutely fine being stored in the silicone pouch without having to have a seperate bag for them.

The eye mask has an elastic band to secure it to ones head, and is quite deeply cushioned. It fit Mrs Chimp quite nicely, though does let in a teeny bit of light at the bottom. She isn’t a fan of the slogan ‘happy rabbit, happy place!’ on the front, as the kids are bound to ask what it means, and she doesn’t really want to tell them it’s her wanking mask.

The balm is menthol, but smells like bubblegum. Witchcraft. It was effective for Mrs Chimp though. It does take a moment or 30 to kick in, so don’t go too liberal too quick.

The toy itself is really cute. Mrs Chimp loves the pink colour, and how soft to the touch it is. The ears are soft and flexible, but are very precise when in use. It looks like there are two buttons, but the small one doesn’t seem to connect to anything under the silicone, so I’m going to say that it’s not a button at all. If you aim for the stick of the ‘exclamation point’ rather than the dot you should be fine. The travel lock is pretty easy on this one; all it takes is a quick double-tap of the button to activate/deactivate.

It’s got a decent amount of patterns, and is pretty quiet and discreet in use. It’s not kickass powerful, but is a solid medium vibe in both power and frequency. Unfortunately, it does transfer a lot of vibration to your hand. Mrs Chimp had to swop hands half-way through, and her fingers took a couple of minutes to recover (she may be more sensitive than some due to carpal tunnel). It does works really well though, and Mrs Chimp had no problems climaxing with this toy.

We have a few niggles, but overall the set is a good little bundle. The toy is fun, the eye mask is comfy, the balm was effective, and Mrs Chimp also loves that it comes with a little carry case, which she reckons would be perfect for weekends away, or just to be able to easily find it in your bedside drawer.

Overall Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Pros: That it all slips into the case.

Cons: Could have done without the slogans, and the weird non-button button.

Bottom Line: Handy little clit kit. Would make a nice gift, or a good travel pack.

(I thought I’d given this a title. Can’t remember what it was though. I’ll have a think. )

[Peitho]

by @Peitho , 6th April 2021
Womanizer X Lovehoney InsideOut Rechargeable G-spot and Clitoral Stimulator

Inside and Out this is the Crème de la Crème of Sex Toys

So first impressions, good functional packaging which I will be keeping to store it in, no storage bag but when the box is ideally moulded to hold it that is fine. The quality of the silicone is lovely with a beautiful silky, soft feel. You get a brief safety instructions leaflet and a more detailed user manual which includes extremely thorough advice on cleaning which can be an issue for suction toys.

The InsideOut has an excellent magnetic charger point on a USB cable with a very secure connection compared to some others I have used. When plugged in there is a flashing green light that appears in the suction opening which is a snazzy positioning for the light, once fully charged the light stays permanently on so you know you’re ready to go. A full charge from flat takes up to 120 mins but the toy came with a substantial charge already so no waiting time to get started.

The IsideOut comes with two clitoral head attachments, a standard size pre attached and a second larger head in a sealed bag. Having fully tested both I favour the smaller head but having the option is a definite bonus and they are very easy to change.

The buttons are a little fiddly to use until you get familiar with them as they are hard to see however they are cleverly designed with the positive buttons domed and the negative buttons recessed. A firm press of the positive suction button turns the toy on and holding this button again will turn it off.

There are 12 intensity levels of both suction and vibration, no patterns, which for me is a definite plus. With just a couple of exceptions I am not a fan of patterns, I generally go up through intensities with a vibrator and then just when I don’t want to, I hit a pattern and have to cycle all through again to get back where I want to be. None of that here! The vibrating G-spot arm works exactly the same as the clitoral suction and just gets more intense.

I imagine this can suffer from the same issue as rabbits in that one size does not fit all. I have some bunnies that are spot on for my anatomy and some that although ideal on paper just don’t hit all the right spots. For me personally though, the InsideOut could not be any more compatible. The G-spot arm is exactly in the key position, it has a great flexibility to it so the pressure and vibrations are perfectly focussed and the suction head is simultaneously planted perfectly. Less than a minute in and that clitoral head is not going anywhere as my vaginal muscles have clamped on so tight.

Squirting is not my normal. This changes that, it is soooo good.

I have a WeVibe Melt, also an exceptional device, but for me, this is better because you can let go and it stays locked and you have that full satisfied feeling for the most intense blended orgasms. Truly the crème de la crème of sex toys and guaranteed results every time.

The only negative with the InsideOut is the volume, positioned perfectly it is not too loud but if you lose that clitoral lock or turn it on not connected you’ll definitely hear it in neighbouring rooms.

Now, I did at first get sent a faulty InsideOut, I think some inner electrics had got a little cross wired in construction so it wouldn’t turn on and then leapt into life when connected to the charger and wouldn’t switch off again… it had to go and sleep on it’s own in the spare room until the battery died! Thankfully, Lovehoney’s customer care is the best you’ll find on the Internet. Free return postage was provided as they wanted to know what had gone wrong with the toy and learn from it and a replacement provided immediately. When this toy works as it’s meant to there is no other better.

Final summary, the price tag may not be small but it’s a lot less the Duo, which I can’t see being any better so unless you need stealth for masturbation, in which case you may struggle, absolutely buy this. You will not regret it and it’s worth every single penny!

Overall Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Pros: Ideal anatomically for me, perfection on every pleasure point. Introduced me to squirting.

Cons: A little loud but the same applies to all suction toys without the Smart Silence.

Bottom Line: Perfection, buy it, do not hesitate!

[PKH]

by @PKH, 10 Aug 2021
Womanizer Premium Smart Silence Clitoral Stimulator Black

A Different Kind of Stimulation : )

Straight out of the box, it looks really stylish and sleek. The feel is silky and luxurious. The drawstring bag it comes with feels silky and sleek too and is the perfect fit for the stimulator as well as the cord and extra heads. I’d recommend reading all of the instructions before using it the first time to get the most out of it sooner and to avoid frustrating user errors (and you have time for this during it’s initial charge up). It comes with a small head and a medium head (I swapped to the medium head right away).

The first couple times using it, it didn’t feel good at all while I was using it (I personally don’t think it feels like oral), but then when I got close to climaxing (and pretty quickly), it felt reallllly good! So the next couple times I used it, I just kinda laid there waiting for it to feel good, then when I’d get close to climaxing it would hit me hard. I remembered I hadn’t tried the autopilot function. Man, the first time I used autopilot, it felt so good the whole time… It was building me up then easing off, but I still had an orgasm pretty quickly. It doesn’t hurt my clit while I’m using it, but I’m always a little sore after I’m done (and it’s a different kind of soreness than when I get sore from my bullet), so I’ve been using it every other time swapping with my bullet. When I try to hold other toys in place with my thighs, they usually slip out of place, but with this, it stays in place and doesn’t lose the suction. I’ve used it with my glass dildo, but I don’t think I want to try sex with it because the tip of it sticks out a bit blocks part of my vagina. I can maneuver around it with a dildo, but I don’t think me or my husband would enjoy piv sex with it.

Since the “+” button is large, I can find it easily when I want to increase the setting, and then I know the “-“ button is right below it, so I don’t have to try to look at it while I’m using it. It’s not too loud on the lower settings. Rather than just a buzzy sound, it makes a sound like a junky old car or a boat or something, but a quiet junky car on the lower settings, and then obviously louder on the higher settings. If I have music or a fan on, it’s quiet enough to use discreetly with other people in the house. I like the smart silence function because when I take it off my clit when repositioning or after climaxing, it pauses without me needing to press any buttons. Sometimes the sensor will be off and it will continue when there is no contact, but then I can just turn it off, make sure the silicone head is on right, and turn it back on and it corrects itself. I haven’t needed lube to use it so far, I’ll either lick the silicone head to get it wet before I start or use my own juices. It is pretty noisy while cleaning it because it is supposed to be submerged in water for one minute while on the highest setting. When I read about how to clean it, I thought it would be a pain because of having several steps, but after doing it a few times, it’s been pretty quick and easy to clean. Take off the tip, spray it with toy cleaner, and wash as usual, then spray toy cleaner into the stimulator’s hole, let it sit for 30 seconds, fill a cup or small bowl with warm water, then run the stimulator on high for one minute submerged in the water, then rinse it off (I usually need to scrub around the hole with toy cleaner to get my juices off it too).

It was a bit pricy so I waited until I had a discount code, but I figured, if I don’t love it, I can return it, and I’m happy with it : )

Overall Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Pros: Love love love the autopilot function

Cons: The tip covers part of my vagina, so no piv sex with this toy

Bottom Line: Worth the price for powerful orgasms ; )

[PKH]

by @PKH, 29 Sept 2021
Lovehoney Cherry Flavored Lubricant 3.4 fl oz

Sweet Candy Lube!

This was exactly the flavored lube I had been looking for! It’s very sweet, but the taste and smell are good. I typically stay away from cherry flavored things because they usually taste like medicine, but this one tastes more like candy! I also have the LH strawberry lube, which I like, but I prefer the cherry because its flavor is stronger. This is my go to lube when giving my husband oral because it masks his natural smells and flavors a bit! Also, when I use toys while giving oral, I can just use a little extra of this lube to give the toys more slip.

The bottle is the perfect size for travel, although I haven’t traveled with it yet, but I am confident in the seal of the cap. It seals well considering I’ve tossed it in drawers and stored it upside down and no leakage so far! I tend to get lube all over my lube bottles while in use, but it cleans off really easily with just a rinse. I’d recommend this lube if you’re looking for a sweet fruity flavor!

Overall Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Pros: I love the taste of it!

Cons: No complaints!

Bottom Line: Fruity and sweet, perfect for oral : )

[PKH]

by @PKH, 29 Sept 2021
Lovehoney Strawberry Flavored Lubricant 3.4 fl oz

Mellow Strawberry Taste : )

I got this strawberry lube after enjoying the LH cherry lube. I prefer the cherry flavor because it’s a bit sweeter and stronger tasting than the strawberry flavor, but I still like the strawberry flavored lube quite a lot. This one is my husband’s go to when playing with my nipples, so I use it when putting on my nipple suckers. Just like all the LH lubes that are 3.4 fl oz (100 ml), the bottles are perfect for travel and the lids seal very well to prevent spills. I’d recommend the LH cherry lube first, but if you don’t like things too sweet, I’d definitely recommend this strawberry lube!

Overall Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Pros: Good strawberry flavor!

Cons: I’d have liked the flavor to have been a little stronger

Bottom Line: Perfect flavored lube if you don’t like it too sweet!

[PKH]

by @PKH’s OH, 4 Aug 2021
Oxballs Atomic Jock Stretchy Cock and Ball Sleeve

My New Favorite Cock Ring

I’ve only recently started using cock rings (Tracey Cox EDGE Supreme Endurance Triple Stamina Ring Set). I was a bit skeptical of getting this cock and ball sleeve because I thought the thickness of it would be too tight and restrictive. Compared to single rings, this is a bit harder to get on and off because it doesn’t stretch as much as the thinner cock rings, but it still has a good stretch, it’s just a bit thicker, but I actually feel like I’m less likely to snap myself now. It needs a little bit of lube to get it on and positioned (penis first, then balls), but then once it’s in place, it doesn’t move around as much as rings do. A little lube keeps it from pulling on my pubic hairs too.

The tighter restriction of this sleeve felt much better than using a single rings or even a couple rings in combination (ex: one ring around my shaft and balls, one on my shaft, and one around my balls). Another reviewer said it’s as if someone with their forefinger and thumb wrapped around your balls gently pulls down, and I have to agree. I liked the sensation of my balls being slightly pulled down, and it wasn’t uncomfortable at all.

Each time I use this, it has intensified my orgasms. My erection is harder and lasts longer than when I don’t wear it. It’s becoming my go to cock ring. While masturbating, I really noticed the tugging on my balls, and my balls were swinging a bit more than usual. During piv sex, it’s no problem to use along with a condom. My wife was afraid the sleeve would pinch her or would be uncomfortable for her, but it’s very soft, so it didn’t bother her, in fact, she said it felt good having the edges of the sleeve pressing into her with each thrust. The impact of hitting against my wife pulled the sleeve back, which pulled my foreskin more than usual (which I liked).

The sleeve is easy to clean. It didn’t come with a storage bag, but my wife gave me a little drawstring bag to store it in to protect it from dust and lint. I didn’t expected to like the sling this much, but I highly recommend it (especially if you think you’d like the feeling of your balls being held or tugged).

Overall Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Pros: It pulls my foreskin and tugs my balls just right

Cons: No complaints

Bottom Line: It gives a nice restrictive and tugging sensation : )

[PKH]

by @PKH’s OH, 17 Aug 2021
Male Power Cotton Rib Sexy Thong

My First Thong

This is my first thong. I’ve never wanted to buy or wear a thong, but my wife wanted me to try it and chose this one. The website only had one picture, so I didn’t really know what to expect, but this thong is extremely comfortable. I was worried about if it would fit because it’s only available in one size, but it has a good stretch and fits me well (I’m 6’00” and I wear a 32” waist for my jeans). It has plenty of room in the front for an erection, while not being saggy when I am just relaxing. The fabric is a really nice quality, very smooth and soft. I have no discomfort just relaxing and wearing it while hanging out with my wife. I was definitely self-conscious the first time I tried it on, but thinking about how much my wife liked it on me quickly helped me enjoy wearing it, and now it makes me feel more attractive. Now I’m looking forward to getting another thong to start building a collection.

Overall Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Pros: It’s very soft and comfortable

Cons: No complaints

Bottom Line: I’d recommend this thong : )

[PKH]

by @PKH, 4 Sept 2021
Lovehoney Red Crotchless Lace Ruffle-Back Panties

Ideal Crotchless Panties

I wear size 2/4 US depending on the style with a 27” waist and 35” hips, and I bought the S/M in red. These are my first crotchless panties, and I love them! They’re EXACTLY what I wanted. The open crotch is perfect for solo play, oral, and piv sex. It goes up high enough in the back for anal play too! These panties are very comfy, and the lace feels soft and delicate. The elastic edges could be stretchier. The fit is fine around my waist, but it is a little tight around my legs. The ruffles and ribbon in the back are very cute. My husband loves touching them while we play. When I got these, one of the rows of ruffles had come completely unstitched and was hanging down. I called LH to ask about returns, and they sent a replacement pair out that day, and it arrived with the ruffles intact. Not sure if the ruffles aren’t securely stitched on or if my pair was by chance, but now I’m worried that the other ruffles may come loose. They’re easy to clean, but I’m extra careful with them (because I don’t want any stitching to come out). I feel really sexy when I wear these, so if they keep in good condition for several more uses, I think I’ll order another pair in black or purple!

Overall Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Pros: The big open crotch is perfect for any kind of play

Cons: The elastic a bit tight around my legs, and the ruffles seem to be stitched on delicately

Bottom Line: Very sexy, love the open crotch area!

[PKH]

by @PKH, 23 Aug 2021
Mapale Black Wet Look Thong

Sexy Wet Look Thong!

I wear size 2/4 US depending on the style. I’m 5’00” with a 27” waist and 35” hips, and I bought the S/M. It is very low-cut in the front (even for a shorty like me), so it may be too small for taller people. I love the look and feel of this thong, makes me feel very sexy. The Y-back is a bit different from the thongs I usually wear, but I love the look of it. It is comfortable to wear and easy to clean. It’s exactly what I expected when I ordered it. The fabric is shiny and feels slick and durable, perfect wet look! I like to wear this thong along with my Mapale Wet Look Ruffle Mini Skirt. My husband loves the look and feel of it too. I recommend this for anyone wanting a low cut wet look thong : )

Overall Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Pros: Fits perfectly and love the material

Cons: Nothing

Bottom Line: Very sexy low cut wet look thong : )

[PKH]

by @PKH, 29 Aug 2021
Mapale Black Lace High Leg Thong

I don’t hate it, but I def don’t love it

I wear size 2/4 US depending on the style, 5’00” with a 27” waist and 35” hips, and I bought size small in black. I like the material. The lace is very sexy, soft and delicate (but not so delicate that I worry about tearing or snagging).

I’m not crazy about the shape and fit of this thong. It did not fit me the way it looks on the models. The back looks and fits just fine, but the sides are a bit loose, and the way the front of the thong is sewn, I have to wear the sides up really high above my hips in order for the front of the thong not to have unsightly folds/creases. If I wear the sides lower on my hips (like where the model has the straps across her hips), the front of the thong on each side puckers out in a way that I don’t think looks attractive. That being said, I’m not a huge fan of high waist panties in the first place, so I should’ve known when “high leg” is in the name of the product. It is very low cut in the front, which I don’t usually mind, but in combination with wearing the sides very high, I don’t feel sexy at all when I wear it.

Even though I like the material, I wanted to return it because the fit was so off, but my husband actually likes the look (and feel) of it and asked me to keep it, so I’m trying to find a way to wear it that will make me feel sexy. I wouldn’t recommend this to short people with slimmer waists/hips unless they generally like wearing their thong straps up high. If you’re taller or have big hips, the thong will probably be the perfect fit.

Overall Rating: 2 out of 5 stars

Pros: The lace material is very nice

Cons: The material in front puckers on each side if I don’t wear it really high above my hips

Bottom Line: The shape/fit doesn’t flatter all body types

[PKH]

by @PKH, 22 Aug 2021
Lovehoney Massage Wand Deluxe Soft Storage Case

Great fit for wand storage

Perfect fit for my LH Extra Powerful Multispeed Plug In Massage Wand Vibrator, with room for some travel size lubes tubes and other medium sized toys. The zipper and overall case seem to be durable and good quality. I agree with the other reviewers that the long gap on each side is a pain. Small and even medium sized toys can easily slip out the bottom when picking up and moving the case. I made a little stitch on each side attaching the middle of the bottom to the center divider on each side, and now it’s holding its shape better and keeping items securely inside the case. If I couldn’t make that alteration myself, I’d have returned it. Pretty pricy considering it’s 35% of the cost of my actual wand. It’s too bad LH wands don’t come with this LH storage case (considering other LH toys come with these cases).

Overall Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Pros: Discreet and durable case

Cons: Pricy and inconvenient side gaps

Bottom Line: Great fit for my wand

[PKH]

by @PKH, 4 Oct 2021
njoy Pure Plug Small Stainless Steel Butt Plug

My Ideal Butt Plug

I love love love this butt plug! It’s exactly what I wanted and even better than I thought it would be. I was feeling discouraged about solo anal play, because I was experiencing discomfort when using silicone plugs, and I started worrying a lot about my jeweled metal plugs popping into my butt. This was the plug I wanted mainly for the stainless steel material and the fingerloop. When it arrived, it really felt like a luxury item. The packaging made it seem like an expensive jewel in a little treasure box! It looked so tiny and cute, but when I picked it up, it had a nice weight to it. This plug really is quite small (only about 3” around the bulb, and the smallest part of the neck/stem is only 1” around), not intimidating at all. When I want anal play, rather than just popping in a medium plug and waiting for myself to stretch, I wanted to have a plug with a small bulb that I could easily press in when I’m real tight, and then when I get used to the feeling of having something weighty inside, I can slowly pull it out and push it back in, moving very slowly so that the 3” bulb can stretch me out, not just the narrow neck.

I love the shape of this plug. The curve of the plug is very ergonomic, making insertion easier for me because it matches the direction I’m reaching around myself to get to my butt. It’s really easy to press in because the bulb is slightly angled and has a nice point on it. When I’m pulling it out and pushing it back in, it’s not a big ordeal to line it back up like some plugs with more rounded bulbs. Because the plug is so firm (being metal and all), it’s really easy to maneuver around. When I push, pull, or twist, it goes exactly where I want it to go. Also, since it’s metal, it does not need much lube to easily slip in, and I haven’t felt any discomfort from friction when sliding it in or out.

I thought the fingerloop would simply give me peace of mind that the plug wouldn’t disappear inside me, but I’ve been using it as a handle, slipping two fingertips into the loop to push and pull the plug exactly as I desire, and since the fingerloop is narrow, it sits comfortably between my cheeks when I’m wearing it for longer periods. I thought the loop might be too big or uncomfortable while sitting in certain positions, but I’ve had no discomfort so far! I’ve worn it now in combination with clitoral stimulation, while using a dildo in my vagina, and during piv sex. My husband likes the look of it when I wear it and enjoys feeling its firmness from inside my vagina. Having that weight and pressure right inside there intensifies my orgasms. It’s also helped me work up to anal sex with my husband. If you’re into temperature play, that’s an option (I’ve just been warming it on my skin before popping it in), and it’s very quick and easy to clean with some LH toy cleaner.

This butt plug is amazing and definitely worth the price. I’m really glad I bought it, and I have no regrets! If you already have anal experience or use other plugs without discomfort, you may want to skip up to the medium or large sizes, but I’d still recommend this line of njoy plugs! This would make a great gift to someone (if you’re close enough to gift them a butt plug) because it’s an amazing product, and it arrives packaged in such a classy way. I may eventually move up to the medium and large plugs in the future as I do more anal play, but for now, it’s exactly what I want and need!

Overall Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Pros: Cute and comfortable. Firm and easy to maneuver. Weighty. Pointed bulb. Curved. Narrow fingerloop.

Cons: Price (but definitely worth it!!)

Bottom Line: This really is the best butt plug for newbies to anal play or those who want to take it slow